A long lost father and lover
by Kireshai
Summary: Shuichi got sick of Yuki's crap, and left. 15 years later, Shuichi is living in London with his daughter. storyline finished! third epilogue! omake on livejournal: kireshai[dot]livejournal[dot]com
1. Father and daughter

**A long lost father.. And lover.**

Disclaimer: Most definitely, not mine. Well, maybe the storyline is, but nothing else.

Warnings: Swearing, mpreg, self hurt(later on).

Story: Shuichi had enough of Yuki, so he walked out. Unbeknownst to Yuki, Shuichi gave birth to a baby girl 8 months later. 15 years into the future, Shuichi lives with his daughter, Hikari, in England.

Notes: Inspired by Another Generation, _SetoKaibaWheeler _and A feeling never changed, _Yukishuii._ Those fics gave me great ideas to shape for this. Thanks! I read the manga, so this is based on the manga, not the anime...

Just a few new notices for the update: I'd like to thank you all for your reviews so far, and if you're reading this again, thank you for that. But to Kenzan and Destiny, thankyou for letting me know that I needed to elaborate, and I hope that this version is getting closer to what you believe appropriate. Kenzan, I take no offense, thanks for your advice!

"..." speech

'...' thoughts

Chapter one: Father and Daughter.

"Father, we're going to be late for the movie!" A tall girl with dark blonde hair stood at the bottom of a flight of stairs, calling out. She had a lithe figure, thin and graceful, with bright purple eyes and a bright smile. She was smiling at the moment, despite her obvious irritation.

"I know, dear, but I can't find my sock." The voice came from a man standing at the top of the stairs, wearing a shirt, boxers and a single sock. This man was also thin, but shorter than the girl. He had vibrantly purple eyes and messy brown hair. Despite sounding very distressed, he had a very gay look on his face.

Hikari Shindou stamped her foot, flicking her waist-length hair impatiently. "Did you check underneath your rug?" 'Geez, not _again_.'

"Umm, no.." Shuichi Shindou shook his head then walked through a door into another room. After 30 seconds he yelled, "Aha!"

Hikari shook her head, suppressing her laughter at her father's empty-headedness. How he became a high school teacher, she would never know. "Hurry up Dad! And don't forget to put your pants on!"

In his bedroom, Shuichi looked down and noticed he wasn't wearing any pants. "Oh, man, not something else to look for..."

"Under your desk!" The words drifted from below, where Hikari could no longer control her laughter. "Now, HURRY!"

Eventually, Shuichi was dressed and he came downstairs. "Hikari, you forgot to put your contacts on!" Shuichi's eyes were no longer purple, but a deep chocolate brown. He sighed inwardly, 'she hates those contacts.'

"Why do I _have_ to wear them?" She sighed as well, 'I hate contacts, why can't I show my wonderful eyes that I love to the world?' She ran noisily up the stairs and skidded into the bathroom, then ran to the sink. She quickly applied the sky blue contacts she had chosen to her eyes, then ran out of the bathroom. "Happy, _father_?"

"Very happy, darling." He kissed her on the forehead, to a cry of disgust, then started walking down the stairs, smiling inanely.

"Urgh! Gross Dad!" Hikari wiped her forehead on her sleeve, then ran down the stairs and began to tackle her father.

Somehow the pair of them made it to the cinema. Unfortunately, they were late. They hurried to the booth and bought tickets, Hikari screaming all the way.

"Dad! You made us late! We're gonna miss the beginning! Oh shit! You're so mean dad!" She ran around in circles, venting off her worry.

"Hikari, calm down, we're not going to miss the movie, and please _do not swear._"

They walked camly into the movie and took the best seats they could find, which were pretty bad. They watched in silence, enjoying the sad story of a sailor and his fiancee, torn apart by war. As the movie unfolded, they moved closer together, Hikari resting her head on Shuichi's shoulder, the perfect father, and daughter.

After the movie, Shuichi and Hikari walked through the centre to their favourite Japanese restaurant, Tomodachi(A/N don't own them, pity), and sat down for a meal. Both of them ordered raamen, as well as onigiri.

"Hey, Tousan.." Hikari said, chewing on some of her noodles, a pensive look on her face.

Shuichi's hand twitched out of annoyance, and he dropped the noodles he was holding in his chopsticks. "Hikari, please, don't talk with your mouth full, and please don't call me that. We don't live in Japan anymore, so I'd prefer if you called me father." He sighed, wishing his daughter would grow out of her japanese ways, after all, they lived in London now, not Tokyo.

Hikari finished her mouthful, then spoke, a pleading note in her voice. "_Father_, could I go have a look at the music store? I wanted to see if the new Nittle Grasper CD is out." She smiled at him, willing him to let her.

"I'm not so sure, Hikari, last time I let you go there..." Shuichi teased his daughter, a serious look on his face.

Hikari played along as she always did. "But, da-ad, you hardly _ever_ let me go there!" She started to pout, playfully.

Shuichi laughed heartily. "Of course you can go, Hikari. But I don't think I'll come with you. I'll go to the bookstore instead. Apparently a famous author is doing a signing, and I was thinking that I might know them." Shuichi seemed to radiate his excitement.

Hikari drank the rest of her soup, smiling once she had finished. "With the amount of books you read, Father, it's a sure bet you know 'em." She really believed that sometimes, her father read way too many books. "But are you sure? It's your last chance! Don't you want to check for the new CDs?" Hikari understood why her father didn't want to go to the music store, in fact, she saw the pain in his eyes whenever she blasted her Nittle Grasper music throughout the house, for some reason, she felt sure that something happened in his life, involving music.

Shuichi laughed. "True, and no, I will certainly not accompany you to the music store! Who would want to accompany you?" He stood up and threw his bowl in the bin, hiding the deep feeling of regret he felt. 'I can't even listen to their music without feeling the pain in my heart.'

Hikari laughed boyishly at his joke. "Fine then, I'll go on my own!" She spoke affrontedly, still laughing happily. "I'll see you, Daddy!" She ran off, waving and smiling.

Shuichi smiled at his daughter as she receded into the distance. "Bye, love, meet me at the bookstore!" 'She is the greatest treasure in the world, don't you think?' He thought, face pensive. 'Eiri.' He continued to smile at the figure running past the shops.

A/N And there it is! First chappy! Leave you in suspense! Who will be the author! Only I know! Mwa ha ha ha ha! Review please! I know it's super short!

Yeah, extra notes...

Centre- Shopping centre, australian expression for the american word, 'mall'.

Raamen- Also, just Ramen, it's actually the japanese word for noodles in general.

Onigiri- Rice balls, triangle shaped often. Sometimes have a strip of seaweed wrapped around it.


	2. Authors everywhere

**A long lost father.. And lover.**

Well, I don't own it and I'm not gonna bother writing out the notes again, just enjoy the chapter! The warning is mpreg, especially for this chapter.

Yep, same things, I've redone this one too, and I'm really sorry if it's too fast, I guess I'm just a fast girl. ;) well, I hope you just enjoy the new version!

Chapter two: Novelists everywhere.

Shuichi walked slowly through the shopping centre, taking his time. He peered into shop fronts on the way, enjoying his time out, which he rarely had these days, not with 7th form English essays to mark. He sighed, quickening his step, to distract himself from the gloomy thoughts of school the next day. He had promised Hikari, after all, that their day out to central London would not be spoiled by Shuichi in a bad mood. 'I guess I'm breaking the promise.' He sighed, wearily.

After a few minutes of walking, he came across the book store, Kinokuniya(A/N nope, don't own them), and he passed through the glass doors. The store was very busy, even busier than usual, which laid great acclaim to the author who was doing signings. He walked up to the desk to see none other than Nathan Brown, sitting at it. He had a sharp intake of breath, then he smiled at the author.

"Hello, nice to meet you, do you have something you want me to sign?" He said, also smiling politely, looking, nonetheless, rather bored.

"Oh, no, I didn't know who was here, so I didn't bring a book." Shuichi smiled apologetically.

"Oh, it's okay, I get kinda sick of just autographing anyway." He quirked his lips in a sarcastic smile.

Shuichi laughed loudly. "I understand what you mean, do too much of something and it gets tiring." Shuichi smiled hiding his inner thoughts.

"I'm sorry to ask, but you don't look very European, I'm guessing an Asian background?" Nathan asked seriously.

"Ah, yes, Japanese." Shuichi had to laugh at the look on the authors face.

"Really? I've always been interested in that culture." He seemed a bit insulted at Shuichi laughing, but when Shuichi started to apologise, he started to chuckle.

Shuichi decided to just return to the conversation, sitting down next to the table. "Is that so? I've always wanted to learn about other cultures too. Unfortunately, I'm not the best of learners..." Shuichi confessed, feeling rather silly.

Nathan continued to laugh. "Well, everyone is different. So, have you read my books?"

"Yes, and I liked them a lot. I actually have the chance to read some of them quite often, because they're set books at my school, which I enjoy." Shuichi's voice was full of emotion, expressing his great joy.

"Really? I'm glad to hear I am appreciated." The author scratched his nose, looking interestedly at Shuichi.

At that moment, Hikari came into the store, looking for Shuichi. "Father? There you are! They didn't have the CD, Father." She pouted. "Oh, hello!" She said to Nathan Brown. Then whispered into her father's ear, "which author, Daddy?"

"Nathan Brown, Hikari." Shuichi took advantage of her closeness to peck her on the cheek.

"Nice to meet you, Mr Brown!" Hikari spoke while wiping her cheek, immense curiosity shining in her eyes.

"You too, ...Hikari?" The author stammered, blushing.

"Yes, I'm Hikari Shindou!" Hikari beamed while saying this, showing her resemblance to her father. She already liked the author, after only having met him for 30 seconds.

"Is your mother here too?" The author continued to stammer.

A dark look crossed Hikari' s face, which was instantly replaced by an inane grin. "I don't have a mother." A sudden idea had come to Hikari when he mentioned her mother.

Shuichi smiled at Nathan. "I think we should go now. It was very nice to talk to you."

"And you. I rarely meet such open people." The author continued to blush, watching them walk out of the store.

"Farewell!" Hikari bowed politely and exited with her father.

They were on the tube on the way home in a gap in conversation when Hikari spoke. "Father, will you tell me about my mother?"

"No, not now, Hikari." Shuichi looked away, he couldn't meet her eyes.

"You always say that!" Hikari persisted.

"And I will continue to say it.." Shuichi stared off into the distance, using it as an excuse to not look at her.

"But, Daddy, I want to know!" Hikari, pouted, tears starting to well up in her eyes. "Please, _Daddy._"

"Okay, I'll tell you when we get home." Shuichi sighed. He supposed it was about time she knew, after all, she was nearly fifteen.

"Promise?" The tears immediately disappeared from her eyes.

"Yes, I promise, Hikari dear." Shuichi looked into her face, showing the tears that he had hid. "I'll tell you."

* * *

When they arrived home, Hikari rushed to the couch and sat. "Daddy, will you to tell me now?" Her eyes followed him as he crossed the room.

"I know, Hikari, I'm just going to get something, so I'll be back." Shuichi disappeared up the stairs, coming back 2 minutes later. In his hand was a photo.

"Sit down next to me, father." Hikari motioned to the seat next to her, she tried to smile understandingly at him.

"Ordering me around now, are you? Fourteen year old!" Shuichi smiled loftily at her, showing his amusement.

"I'm almost fifteen!" Hikari's voice was indignant.

"But not yet!" Shuichi sat on the couch, facing his daughter. "Anyway, I went to get this picture, so it could add to the story." Shuichi motioned the picture in his hand which he still did not reveal.

Hikari nodded, listening intently to all her father had to say. "Go on father."

"Hikari, I want you to understand that I would never lie to you." Shuichi's ice was soft, showing no emotion, and his eyes were averted, hiding whatever lay within those expressive violet orbs.

"I know, father." Hikari's eyes were deadly serious. She took his hands, holding them in her own, whatever she could do to make it easier for him. "Go on, father."

Shuichi nodded, making a second's worth of eye contact. "At the young age of 17 I fell in love with a novelist." Shuichi let out a sigh after saying this, feeling the pressure start to abate as he got on with it.

"Mmmm, was she pretty?" Hikari continued in attempting to make things easier for her father, but she wasn't doing too well.

"Well, Hikari." Shuichi looked her in the eye. "Have you been studying homosexuality in school at all?" With every word, he became more and more relaxed.

"Uhhh... a little bit..." Hikari frowned, concerned. She didn't understand why her mother had anything to do with something like that. "Why?"

Shuichi handed Hikari the picture, then spoke, still quiet. "Well, the novelist, HE was handsome and rich and cruel and-"

Hikari cut him off, a frown yet again on her face, showing her confusion. "Dad, you just said he..."

Shuichi motioned for his daughter to look at the photo, so she turned it over in her hand, to reveal a handsome young man sitting at a computer. The man had blonde hair and the dreamiest grey eyes, with the longest eyelashes. His was untidy, but it fell with such an elegance about it. He was wearing reading glasses and he was smiling, one of the few times he smiled in his life.

"This is..." Hikari looked up expectantly. 'My father?'

"Hikari, this is your father, the great novelist, Eiri Yuki. Your name, as I have never told you it is Hikari Uesugi Shindou. Uesugi was Eiri's real name." He smiled at he picture, momentarily forgetting about his tears. 'My Eiri...'

'So, I was right, but how is that possible?' Hikari looked down at the photo and then quickly up at her father. "What happened, Daddy?"

"He didn't love me back" The tears, so recent, came again, flooding his eyes as he remembered. We lived together and first had sex when I was seventeen."

Hikari screwed up her nose in disgust. "I didn't want to know that, Dad."

Shuichi smiled weakly at this. "Well, after two years, he gave me so much shit, fucked me up so bad, I couldn't stand it. I hated the way he hurt me. I despised the way he was unfaithful, so I left. I told him I would never come back, and I left." Shuichi continued to stare at the picture of Eiri.

Hikari's eyes were wide, showing the deep involvement she had with the story he was now telling. "Dad, it's so sad. He sounds like a right bastard."

Shuichi smiled weakly, "Mmmm, then eight months later. I had you, and no-one knows how. But you were my gift, my gift from above to remind me of my love. In a sense, I'm your 'mother' since I gave birth, though. But, Hikari, you look so much like him, dear, you are so like him, except for your eyes..." Shuichi raised a hand and removed her contacts, then placed a finger beneath her chin. He looked deep into her beautiful violet eyes. "Your eyes are like mine."

At this, Hikari broke down completely, knocking his hand out of the way, she grabbed him and hugged him tight. 'I'll never leave you, father, I promise that I'll never let you go.'

Shuichi held onto his daughter, no tears escaping anymore. 'I'll never say goodbye to you, Hikari, I promise I'll always be there. Wouldn't you be...' Shuichi gazed at the man in the picture yet again. 'My dear Eiri?'

A/N That's it! The second chapter! Ain't I cruel? You all thought it would be Eiri! And I think another author's got a bit of a crush... Well sorry disappoint you all, but don't worry, you will all see your favourite novelist soon! Even though I let you down, please continue to read my story! Review! Also, tell me, should it end happy or sad, I need to know, because I can think of some lovely tragic endings to use...


	3. News from the homeland

**A long lost father.. And lover.**

Hey, yose! Umm, if you think Hikari's acting a bit immature for a 14 yr old, just understand I act like that and I'm fourteen... yeah, that's all. Umm, Gravitation doesn't belong to me, you should know the circumstances if you're reading this chapter, yeah.. Usual warning, mpreg.. Oh, I have to thank the british airways people for helping me research flights and air ticket prices, etc...

Also, Shuichi has a sister, Maiko, in the manga, so I'm using her as a character in this. Yeah, I don't own British airways, and the only true thing is that they have flights to Narita airport from Heathrow airport.

Anyway, enjoy the chapter!

Chapter 3: News from the homeland.

-Flashback-

"_Eiri!" Shuichi shouted before hugging his lover violently. He was always happy when his Eiri came home to him. "How was your day?"_

"_Get off me, brat." Yuki shoved him away, stalking into his bedroom, which was his standard greeting._

_Shuichi pouted, tears forming in his eyes. "Eiri, being soo mean!" He followed Yuki into the bedroom, his pink hair waving about in his distress._

"_Don't you have anyone else to haunt?" Eiri looked at Shuichi as if he were a bug._

"_Why are you so mean to me, Eiri?" Shuichi pouted yet again, but it had no effect on Eiri, who was used to it._

_Yuki shrugged, "Why not?" His voice held obvious disdain._

"_Do you want to hurt me, Eiri?" Shuichi stared up at him, seriously. He couldn't understand why his lover treated him like this._

"_Yes." Yuki just turned away, ignoring Shuichi. He didn't understand why Shuichi was crying._

_Shuichi ran around to face Yuki, angry for the first time. "Yuki!" His eyes were very bright and his mouth was a firm line._

_Eiri paid attention at the sudden change of names. "What is it, dimwit?"_

"_If this is the way you're going to treat me, you piece of shit, well then, fuck you!" He clenched his fists, his knuckles turning white._

"_Strong words, runt." Eiri coninued to stare disdainfully down at Shuichi, as if he meant nothing at all._

"_I HATE YOU, EIRI **UESUGI**." Shuich yelled, then he put his arms around Eiri's neck, kissing him violently, passionately. "That's because I used to love you." He then slapped Eiri across the face. "And that's repayment for all you did to me! So, don't ever expect me back to darken your doorway, you evil bastard! I won't be here to filthy your sheets or waste your time, so I'll suppose you'll just take on a couple more lovers in my absence! And you'll just forget me in a week or two!" After yelling all this, he stormed out, never looking back._

_Yuki just stood there, staring. He didn't understand what he did wrong._

-end flashback-

Shuichi was awoken from his memories by the phone ringing. In the last two weeks, leading up to Hikari's birthday, he had had many like it, as if telling his daughter had reawakened them or something. He shivered, at the thought of what he just saw, certainly the most unpleasant memory not involving sex. He faintly remembered that the phone was ringing, so he walked over and picked it up. "Shindou household, Shuichi speaking."

"Shuichi, Hello, It's your mother." The voice was rather soft, tired.

"Mum, Hello! Why are you calling me so late?" Shuichi didn't understand why she was calling, after all, Hikari's birthday was tomorrow.

"Shuichi, dear, it's 5am." The voice of his mother was rather exasperated.

"Mum, I'm in England." Shuichi pointed out drily, switching the hand holding the phone.

"Oh, right, dear. Oh, well. But, Shuichi I'm sorry to intrude, but it's urgent."

"What is it?" Shuichi fidgeted nervously, wondering what could be so important.

"It's Maiko, dear." His mother let out a sigh.

"Is there something wrong?" Shuichi's voice was catching in his breath.

"Well, dear, she's very sick."

Shuichi dropped the phone. Maiko was sick? He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He bent down and picked up the phone again. "Sorry, Mum."

"It's okay, Shuichi, but do you think you could get here as soon as possible?"

Shuichi tightened his grip on the phone, he knew what this meant if she wanted him to come back to Japan, it was fatal. "I'll get the first flight I can."

"Thank you, Shuichi. Oh, please bring Hikari too, I would like her to see Maiko, in case..." A sobbing was heard from Mrs. Shindou's end.

"I understand, don't worry, I'll bring Hikari to Japan with me."

"Goodbye, Shuichi, darling."

"Goodbye, Mum."

Shuichi put the phone back on it's holder and sank down into the couch. 'Maiko could die.. I can't believe it...' Shuichi sat thinking for a while, then decided to get into action. Picking up his phone again, he typed in the number for British Airways. He placed the phone to his ear, listening to the ring tone.

"Hello, British Airways, this is Sarah speaking, how may I be of service?"

"Um, Hello, I'd like to book a flight." Shuichi spoke nervously, the fear for his sister still on his mind.

"Okay, where from and to?" The voice was very emotionless.

"Heathrow Airport, London, to Narita Airport, Tokyo."(A/N I don't own any airports either.)

"Date?"

"Well, I was hoping the earliest possible flight."

"That'll be difficult for you to book, let me check." There was a few seconds pause and tapping of keys. "There are still seats available, would you mind business class?"

"Of course not."

"Well, there's a flight tomorrow, 1235 hours. Would you like to take that one?"

"That sounds good." Shuichi started to relax, his heart getting lighter as things started to fit.

"Okay, you'll need to be checked in at 0930 hours, and ready to board at 1130 hours, is that all right?"

"Yes, everything is fine with that." Shuichi stammered in relief.

"Well then, a name for the reservation?"

"Shindou, Shuichi."

"Thank you. Come by the ticket desk tomorrow to pay for and collect your ticket."

"Thank you."

"Good evening, Mr. Shindou."

"Good evening, thank you again, Sarah." Shuichi placed the phone down on its holder and walked upstairs. He changed into bed clothing and set his alarm, then crawled into his bed, wondering how Maiko was doing. He would tell Hikari in the morning.

* * *

Shuichi woke to the tune of his alarm the next morning and groaned, remembering the last night's events immediately. He stood and went directly to wake Hikari, so she could get ready to leave.

"Hikari. Wake up." He said it while walking into his daughter's room. "I need to talk to you urgently."

"What is the matter, Daddy?" Hikari was a light sleeper and awake instantly. "Why do I need to be awake at 5 in the morning?" Her voice was midly curious, showing her obvious confusion.

"Well, Hikari," Shuichi said, sitting on the bed, "I received a call from your Nanna last night, and she had some terrible news about your Aunt." Shuichi tried to speak calmly, but a slight slither of anxiety crept into his voice.

"Is she dead?" Hikari whispered it, eyes growing bigger by the second. 'Why is Daddy so unhappy?'

"No, but she's very ill. And your Nanna wants you to see her." Shuichi put his arms around his daughter.

"When are we leaving?" Hikari hugged her father tightly back.

"In 3 hours, so you should get packed. Just bring some clothes and something to entertain yourself on the flight." Shuichi stood, walking to the door of the room.

"Okay, Father." Hikari stood, and ran across the hall to the bathroom.

At 9am they arrived at Heathrow airport, carrying very small amounts of luggage for an international flight. They went to the ticket desk and paid for their tickets, then hurried to check in their baggage. They spent an hour and a half looking around at shops, then rushed to the departure gate and boarded their flight.

As they took off, Shuichi gazed out of the window. 'I'm coming home... Can you hear me, Eiri?'

A/N Well, I hope you enjoy this chapter! I also hope you didn't die of boredom from the telephone call Shuichi made to the airline, but I wanted to do it properly, the perfectionist I am.. Well, review and give me some ideas, also, do you want eiri to appear next chapter? Let me know! Also, I'm sorry to any people who liked the japanese, but I was told to stop writing in jap. And I must apologize for the shortness. Next time, Kireshai.


	4. A long time alone

**A long lost father... And lover.**

Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation or it's characters, but neither is the storyline Maki Murakami's. So, the characters are hers, this storyline is mine...

Warnings: Mpreg, self hurt(finally..), swearing, and the characters are a bit OOC...

A/N: I'm updating, finally! Yay! More of my story!(And I'm the writer...) Thankyou for the reviews! This chapter is about Eiri! So, enjoy finding out about Eiri's life! The computer system is loosely based on the microsoft™ operating system, seeing as that's what I use. Umm, yeah, I'd thought I'd finally write the ages.. Eiri, 38, Shuichi, 34, Hikari, 15, Ryuichi, 45, Tatsuha, 32, Hiroshi, 34.

Chapter 4: A long time alone.

Yuki Uesugi Eiri turned on his computer. The same way he had done for the last sixteen years. He waited while it loaded, the black screen turning blue. He typed in a password, pressing the enter key on his keyboard, instead of clicking on 'OK'. He waited for his security notices to disappear, then he clicked on his start menu, moving his mouse up to the program for word processing. He clicked the mouse button lazily, watching the white box cover his dull grey desktop.

He leaned back on his revolving chair, thinking hard. He hadn't had this bad a writer's block in his life. He reached in his pocket, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and flicking the top open. Retrieving a smoke, he grabbed his lighter, which was on his desk. Lighting the smoke, he put it in his mouth, leaning back casually in his chair.

Eiri had not changed much in fifteen years, a fact of which he was proud. No wrinkles marred his perfect complection, no grey hairs in his blonde crown. In fact, the only thing that had changed, was that he was a lot sadder. His eyes, they still burned grey, but, they had no more fight, determination, or even emotion in them.

He still had his old habits, he slept with a different woman every night, he avoided his family like the plague, but he did it all with an air of uncaring. His life had gone down the toilet, at the age of twenty-two. And the thing was, he didn't care.

* * *

Shuichi and Hikari walked through the arrivals gate at Narita airport, keeping an eye out for Mrs. Shindou. Shuichi was overwhelmed by the sense of home he received when just walking through the airport. They heard a yell to their left, and there, waiting for them was Mrs. Shindou and Hiroshi Nakano. Shuichi felt a wave of happiness surge through him and he ran to his old friend, yelling.

"HIROSHIIIIIIIIIIII!" Hiroshi was soon enveloped by a brown-haired mass. "I've missed you so much, Hiroshi." Shuichi was now sitting on top of Hiroshi, who, somehow, had managed to end up face up on the floor.

"That's as beautiful as the flowers in spring, but right now I can't feel below my waist." Hiroshi raised an eyebrow in annoyance, inside he was laughing, Shuichi had not changed.

Shuichi stood up quickly. "Sorry, Hiroshi." Shuichi smiled at his life-time friend. "But I have missed you very much." 'I'm sorry I left you all when I did.'

Hikari caught up with her father then. She smiled her wonderful smile and spoke very calmly. "Hello Grandma, good day Uncle Hiroshi." She looked at her father knowingly. "I'm sorry about my father, sometimes I think maybe he's the one who's fifteen."

Hiroshi was stunned that Hikari remembered him. After all, they hadn't met since she was five. "Hello, Hikari. It's true, your father has not changed since the age of ten." He smiled happily at his surrogate niece. Her presence seemed to lighten the atmosphere, just like Shuichi when he was young.

"Hiroshi!" Shuichi spoke indignantly, punching him on the shoulder. "That's not very nice! I have so changed!"

"Yes I can see it in the change of vocabulary." Hiroshi continued to grin until Shuichi decided to tackle him and stop his teasing. Hiroshi yelped and ran away, and soon the two of them were running around the airport like preschoolers.

"Men..." Grandma Shindou sighed, "they just can't behave out in public." She continued to follow the pair with her eyes to make sure they didn't cause any serious trouble.

"Nanna, I wanted to ask you something..." Hikari brought up her courage to say it. "About my father?"

"What can you need to know about Shuichi?" Grandma Shindou stared at her strangely, after all, the two of them were close as could be. She probably knew more than Grandma Shindou did.

"Ummm, I don't mean him, I mean, my other father." Hikari looked into her grandmother's eyes seriously, discerning her reaction. When it came, she had the biggest surprise of her life.

"Did Shuichi tell you about him? He said he wouldn't. You don't need to know about him, Hikari, he ruined your father's life." Grandma Shindou's face had become clouded when she spoke, but it lightened up when she looked at Hikari. "Don't worry about Yuki. You only have one parent, and always will have him."

Hikari could not forget about him though. She wanted to meet the man who had given her his looks, had taken away her father's life, but, could still give them both something more... A proper family.

A few minutes after their talk ended, Shuichi and Hiroshi came back to stand with them. "Are we going to go straight to the hospital?" Hiroshi directed his comment to Grandma Shindou.

Shuichi nodded. "Of course we are, if Maiko's sick, we must."

A dark look crossed Grandma Shindou's face and she spoke in a deep voice. "NO! You will sleep first, then visit Maiko. I don't want you passing out all over the place." Grandma Shindou, already taller than her son, seemed to grow a foot.

Shuichi, on the other hand, was cowering behind Hiroshi, in fear of his life, when he replied, "okay."

Grandma Shindou seemed to deflate immediately. "Good boy. Come, everyone, I'll lead you to the car." And, following Grandma Shindou, they headed towards the car.

* * *

Eiri stared blankly at the screen in front of him. He was quite sure he'd been staring at it for the last hour. He looked at his watch and noticed that it was 2am. He'd been there for three. He stood up, he knew this was getting nowhere. 'Oh well, time for the park.'

He picked up his keys, dropped his cigarettes and walked out the door.

* * *

Shuichi and Hikari were at the hospital. After getting the sleep she had insisted they get, they had driven out together in her car. But, when they got there, they found the most terrible news. Maiko was getting worse, and they could do nothing to stop the decrease.

Grandma Shindou had gone home at 11pm, too tired to stay, but Shuichi had begged to stay the night with her. Hikari promised to stay with her father overnight. So, they kept vigil by Maiko's bedside. At 2am, Hikari stood.

"Father, I"m going to go walk in the park across the road." Hikari pointed out the window to emphasise her point. 'I can't take this stuffy atmosphere of death.'

"Okay, you can go, but don't be too long." Shuichi smiled as he watched her leave the room, then he turned back to Maiko, who's light brown hair was fanned around her, reflecting the small amounts of light in the darkened room. 'At a time like this, that's what you'd do, isn't it, Eiri?'

A/N Done! Yay! If you have problems, or don't understand anything, review! If you don't, review anyway! I guess this one is a bit obvious... and I'm sorry if it's too fast, but I don't like to waffle around. Anyway, I will update soon. And tell me if you think it should be happy or sad!


	5. Like we've met before

**A long lost father... And lover.**

A/N My story has become so predictable, 'cos some of you guessed it in your reviews, well, please enjoy this chapter. Oh, yes, this chapter will have P.O.V. finally...

Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation or any of it's characters.

Warnings: Yeah, Mpreg, Swearing, Self hurt(Yay, it really is here this time! I'm an angst writer normally, so...) And that's about it.. Later on there will be sex scenes, but not right now. I'm really sorry, but the characters are a bit OOC.

Now, to the story:

Chapter 5: Like we've met before.

Hikari shivered. 'It sure is cold out here. I should have brought a jumper. She rubbed her hands together, warming herself. She breathed in deeply, admiring the ambience of the clean tokyo air. "Mmmm, I love Tokyo." Her voice was clear in the night.

"Talking to yourself is the first sign of madness." A cold, deep voice came from the dimly lit space ahead of her.

Hikari jumped of fright. She hadn't expected anyone to be out here at this time of night, after all, it was 2am. She squinted ahead of her and managed to see a man there. Suddenly she remembered her contacts, they weren't on, and this man would see her purple eyes. 'Oh well, not much choice, anyway, maybe he won't notice.' She spoke, her voice strong, despite her anxiety. "General consensus is that talking to me is madness."

"Is that so? Why is that?" Hikari could sense the man's movements.

"Because, if you can get a word in edgewise, I must be asleep." She moved into the light, so he could see her and she could see him. Before her was a man with blonde hair and grey eyes. He was staring directly at her, transfixed.

She was staring at him too. 'It couldn't be...' The thought passed quickly through her head. The man broke the staring match first, turning his head away to look to his right.

Hikari couldn't stop staring. After a minute, she whispered, "Eiri... Uesugi..."

The man faced her after hearing this. His eyes showed extreme suspicion. "Who are you? How do you know that name?" He continued to look at her, prompting a response.

'It must be.' Hikari spoke louder. "You are Uesugi Eiri, correct?"

"That may be so, but who are you?" His voice, also, was louder, as well as being a lot more threatening.

"Oh." Hikari giggled. "My name is Hikari. Hikari, Uesugi, Shindou. A _novellist _named Uesugi Eiri was my father."

Eiri went blank. "I haven't had any children, to my knowledge." He put his arms behind him, lounging on the bench.

Hikari pushed on. "That's because I wasn't 'born to your knowledge' as you put it so delicately." She didn't like this man at all.

"What did you say your name was, kid?" Eiri turned his face away, showing his disinterest in the conversation.

Hikari looked directly at him, despite not being able to see his eyes. "My name I Hikari Uesugi Shindou." She was almost yelling. His response gave her immense satisfaction.

"SHINDOU!" Eiri jumped off the seat, disbelieving. "That is not possible, girl."

"My name is Hikari! And why is that not possible!" Hikari's eyes were alight with rage. This man was so infuriating. 'It's no wonder Daddy left him.'

"_Because_" He emphasised the word, giving the air that he was explaing one plus one equals two to an overemotional three year old. "The only Shindou I knew was a man! Two men can't have children."

Hikari hmphed, facing the opposite direction with her hands on her hips. "How do you know that? And that man you knew." She paused for dramatic effect. "Was Shuichi Shindou, right?" She stayed where she was, imagining the look of surprise on his face. She waited for his response. When it didn't come, she turned around, she found an empty bench. Eiri had walked off.

'Eiri Uesugi' She clenched her fists in anger. "You BASTARD!"

* * *

YUKI'S P.O.V.

Okay, so I walked away from her like a coward. True, but what can I say? I've been running away from the memories that boy brought for nearly sixteen years. I don't need him back in my life. Neither do I need his relations coming up to me and claiming to be my spawn. Actually, that's not fair. I'm the one who started the conversation... Oh, just shut up!

I arrived at my house, walked in and pressed the up button on the lift. As the car came down the shaft, I was still thinking about the conversation I had with that girl. She had looked like my sister, except for her eyes. They were purple. And scary. I got onto the lift, pressing the button for the next floor up. "Purple eyes..." Where had I seen purple eyes before? Ah, yes, of course, the brat had purple eyes.

I stepped off the lift and walked down the corridor, stopping outside my door. I was about to put my key in the lock when I stopped moving. I was going through the calculations in my head. Hikari had purple eyes, Shuichi had purple eyes. No-one else did. That meant that Hikari was Shuichi's daughter. That also meant Shuichi had been or still was with a woman. And judging by the girls age... It wasn't possible, was it? I was shocked, that he could ever do that.

A terrible feeling was seeping through me as I unlocked and opened my door. I walked through my hall, to my kitchen, dragging my feet, and I picked up the pocketknife lying on the bench, ready to open the old wounds, as the memories wound through my head.

_I was staring at my bedroom door, my mouth open. I was confused, and tired. I'd just come home after a bad day and the boy had jumped me. So, naturally I'd grumbled and made the usual insults. Then he'd got all teary and left, telling me he'd never return. "I HATE YOU, EIRI UESUGI." The words pounded through my head. That was great, the boy'd walked out **again**, just putting the icing on the **perfect** day._

_I came out of my trance, his voice still reverberating in my mind. I lay down on my bed, falling asleep with the expectance of a rude awakening the next morning. But it didn't come, neither the next. And when he stopped being here, my life stopped. After about a month I knew it for sure, the boy would never come back to me. That's when the pain started. Worse than ever before, worse even than in New York._

_I'd heard about cutting, but never tried. Why? I don't know, but at that time, it seemed like the right idea. It was the remedy. It would draw my mind away from the pain. Detract from the hurt I was feeling. One night, I took the pocket knife from my kitchen bench, and opened it. Placing the blade on my wrist, I put a slight amount of weight on it, and was rewarded with the sight of dark blood dripping onto the floor._

_I traced along my vein, ignoring any pain it caused. Because, in comparison to what I felt inside, this was nothing. All the while, his words were pounding inside my head. 'That's repayment for all you did to me!' I could feel his lips pressed against mine, wet with tears as he showed his last vestige of love. I cut again, deeper. 'Don't ever expect me to darken your doorway, you evil bastard!' I could feel the slight pain in my cheek where he'd shown me all his hate. I cut my wrist again and again. Until I couldn't feel or hear it anymore, until I was taken by darkness._

I walked to my living room, not paying attention to my surroundings.

"If you black out again, Eiri, I am _not_ gonna be the person who carts you off to hospital, man."

I looked up, dropping the knife, which landed with a thud on the floor. "Tatsuha? Huh?" He was sitting on the couch, looking camly up at me.

"Hello, Eiri, not expecting me? You should know to _always_ expect me." He smiled faintly.

"Why are you here, Tatsuha?" I stood straight, trying to regain my composure.

"Well, I just came to give you some interesting news, but I guess from what you were about to do, you wight already know what I wanted to talk about." His face turned serious when he mentioned my actions. I was thinking I should've made sure he wasn't here before I started. I glared at him angrily.

"What news?"

Tatsuha gestured next to himself. "Sit!" He ordered. "And then I'll tell you." He smiled inanely at me.

I inched toward the sofa and sat, animosity all over my face.

Tatsuha stopped his stupid fake smile and patted my head. "Good boy."

"Don't push it, Tatsuha, as you can probably see, I am _not_ in a good mood." He didn't seem fazed at all by my glare.

"You're all talk, Eiri. Anyway." He scratched his chin in thought. "Ah, yes. I got this off Ryuichi, who heard it from Tohma, who was told by Mika, who was talking to Ayaka Nakano." He concluded the list triumphantly.

"Is that it?" Eiri raised an eyebrow.

"No. Hiroshi Nakano said to her that he had gone to meet him at the airport." Tatsuha said with a smile.

"Who?" I was in no mood for guessing games.

"Shuichi, of course." Tatsuha sighed. "Who else?"

"Father christmas, maybe." That mightn't have been the best way to keep his temper down. "Anyway, I know he's back."

"I guessed that, how do you know?" Tatsuha was rather concerned about the source, after all, it had to be pretty bad news for it give me that effect.

"I met his daughter." I turned away, hinting I didn't want to talk about it.

"Oh, you met little Hikari!" He didn't take the hint.

"Little! I saw that girl, and she was anything _but_ little." I stood angrily.

"What is that supposed to mean?" He stood too, trying to calm me with a hand on my shoulder.

"You know what it means."

"I'm your brother, not a mind reader, I do not, repeat, do not, know everything going on in that twisted mind of yours." He was really trying to calm me down, but I wasn't gonna let it work.

I pushed out what was on my mind, yelling rather than speaking. "I saw that girl. She is way too old to have been conceived before that brat left me! He must have been sleeping with a woman before he did!"

Tatsuha laughed coldly. "That's ridiculous, Eiri. I know Shuichi well, and you knew him too. He would _never_ betray you, even after you died."

I grunted, turning to face away from him again. "Then you give me an explanation!"

Tatsuha sighed behind me. I knew I was being very difficult. "Tell, me, how often did you and Shuichi have sex?"

I whipped my head around to glare at him. "That's personal, Tatsuha."

"True, but I already know the answer." I glared at him for that. "Y'know, Shuichi didn't have the time to be with a woman, because you fucked him senseless every night." Not the exact choice of wording I would have used.

"So? That doesn't prove anything."

He grabbed my shoulders, assuring I didn't look away again. "Y'know, I'm now thinking he should've. Then he wouldn't have been hurt so much when he left you. You ruined his life, Eiri, yet you're acting like you've been wronged. Think about it." He let go of me and walked towards the door. When he got there, he turned back to look at me.

"Understand this, Eiri, I've had a niece called Hikari for fifteen years." He opened the door, walked through it and slammed it behind him.

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V.

"Hikari, you're back." Shuichi walked up to his daughter and hugged her.

"Hi, Dad, sorry I was so long." She sat down next to Maiko's bed.

"Are you okay, Hikari?" Shuichi looked his daughter up and down, scanning for injury.

Hikari noticed his eye movement. "Don't be silly dad." She giggled. "I did meet someone in the park though."

"Ohh, really? Who?" Shuichi sat down in the seat next to her.

"My father."

Shuichi fell off his chair in surprise. "Oww, how embarrassing." He stood and sat on the chair again. "So, what did you think of him?"

"He was..." Hikari pondered if she should say what she really felt. She decided she couldn't lie to her Dad. "A complete and utter bastard. He was rude and he walked away when I was talking to him."

Shuichi laughed when she said that. "That sounds very much like my first encounter with a certain someone." Shuichi gazed out the window. 'Very much so, ne, Eiri?'

A/N Yay! It is done! Woo hoo, chappy five! It is a lot longer than the others, so, gomenasai. bows repeatedly. I hope you all enjoy the non-cliffy. I will update in the near future.

Last note: ne- a japanese particle used to emphasise your point, or impress your opinion.


	6. Awakening

**A long lost father... and lover.**

Disclaimer: I don't own them, never will. I just play with them occasionally...

A/N: Uhhh... I believe this chapter will be rather short, so I am very sorry about that. I also need to apologise for taking so long! I went on holiday and then I couldn't be stuffed typing it up... but I am now! And I know that the chapter name is a bit obvious, so, I'm sorry! Ganbattane!

Warnings: Mpreg, as always, shounen-ai, Actually not many... might be a bit of swearing, but I think you'd know that I like to swear a bit by now...

Last thing: ANONYMOUS REVIEWER! IF YOU HAVE THE OPINION THAT THIS IS A LOVE STORY FOR A HETERO FANDOM, THE FIRST THING YOU COULD DO IS GO READ A HETERO FANFIC, BECAUSE YOU MUST READ AN AWFUL LOT OF THEM TO SAY THIS ONE IS, BECAUSE NO-ONE WOULD SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT UNLESS THEY WERE, IN A SENSE, QUALIFIED TO! THE NEXT THING YOU COULD DO IS GO AND BLOW UP A TOILET, PREFERABLY WHILE YOU'RE STILL ON IT, BECAUSE THAT WOULD MAKE THE WORLD BETTER FOR THE REST OF US! AND THIRDLY, YOU COULD FLAME ME USING YOUR ACCOUNT, SO THAT I DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS PUBLICLY AGAIN!

Well, enjoy, all of you not prejudiced against homo fandoms!

Chapter 6: Awakening.

SHUICHI'S P.O.V.

Days go by slowly in tokyo summers, drifting hazily from dark to light, the brightness permeating even your skin in the afternoon, then a slow and gradual crawl into the darkness. Even though I describe it so shortly, it's always so much longer, especially when you're worried. Everyday I sat by my sister's almost lifeless form, as she takes breath after staggering breath. And through the haze I could feel Hikari's heat next to me, keeping a vigil she would keep until I fell. I just knew that, if I couldn't cope, neither could she. So I tried, for her sake.

Hikari spoke little, in her fight against sorrow, and not even Hiro could make her smile this time. Sometimes I thought, that maybe something else was on her mind, something that she needn't think about, but that she, I and a great many other people couldn't get our minds off. Eiri Uesugi.

There was nothing we could do for mother, she was too far gone in her anguish. She could almost tell she was about to lose her only daughter. But, she kept coming, in the small hope that she'd see her open her eyes and blink wearily upwards, whispering mother, or some such word. But she didn't, and as the days passed by, no-one began to doubt that she would not live much longer. A month since we've come, and still she slept.

Suguru didn't come much, he couldn't, not with 4 children depending on him in the absence of their mother. I think he also didn't want to see Maiko so weary and sick looking, after knowing her as such a bright and beautiful person.

I looked fondly at my sister, yet again and kissed her lightly on the forehead, then whispered to her, "I love you always, my dearest little sister." I lay my head on the pillow beside her, closing my eyes. I could feel the slight movements of her body as she took in each breath.

The next movment I did not expect. It was her arm, bending and reaching for my hand. "Shu... I... Chi..." She rasped. "I... La... Fffff..."

"MAIKO!" Shuichi gasped, sitting up straight and grasping her hand. "Are you okay?"

Maiko opened her eyes and smiled up at me. "Do you think... I'd have been... Asleep... If I was..."

I hugged her tightly before realising that it wasn't that good an idea. I stood back, smiling stupidly at her, unable to supress my joy. I noticed, as I looked around, that Hikari must've acted sensibly and gone to get a doctor while I was having hysterics.

"Maiko, I'm so glad you're awake." Hikari yelled as she came in again with a nurse in tow.

* * *

EIRI'S P.O.V.

"Go ahead, take it." I nodded at Mizuki, my dead-brained editor. Who was smiling genially at me, as if I was her nephew and I had just shown her the model aeroplane I'd just made... Really... It's so pathetic.

"How generous of you, Mr. Yuki." She continued to grin inanely at me, with this funky twinkle in her manner and eye. "To hand in a manuscript under a month late... just. What has instigated this occurrence?"

"The thought of your ever delightful visits, my evil editor." I put as much sourness into my manner as I could, while glaring hatefully at her.

She chuckled merrily, increasing my irritation by 300. Damn her and her annoying immunities. I hate it! "Of course it was, Mr. Yuki. Why did I not see it?" She stood, even that giving me irritation, for she seemed to be doing it slowly, and on purpose. "I'll take my leave, Mr. Yuki." She retrieved the manuscript from the table, where I'd lain it earlier, and headed out the door.

After she had left, I searched my pockets for a cigarette and upon finding one, placed it in my mouth. Once it was lit, I leaned back thoughtfully in my chair. In my opinion, editors still and always will have brains of death.

Of course, the real problem plaguing my mind was that girl. No doubt's, she was the offspring of that prat, but to to claim that she was also descended from me was affrontery. They expected me to believe that crap that Shuichi had given birth to a child? Well, I wasn't. It is absolutely impossible for two men to have a child together. So wh y keep on with it! It is impossible!

* * *

SHUICHI'S P.O.V.

One week, 1 agonizing week, and Maiko was out of the hospital, almost back to full strength. She would never ge 'full' strength again, but she was strong enough to walk, and take care of herself.

That night, exactly 1 week after her recovery, we held a dinner party at her house, for convenience of course. And suddenly, the world seemed so alive. Everyone was there. Hiro, as always, was there to support us, with Ayaka faithfully by his side. Their 6 year old boy was running throughout the room, yelling with some of the other children.

Tatsuha was there, mainly there because Ryu-chan was, but also because he cared enough about me to bother. Ryu-chan, as I said, was there. He was no longer blatantly obvious to Tatsuha's feelings, had in fact accepted them, and perhaps returned them fiercer still. The were sitting at a table, talking like they usually did, with the occasional emotional embrace. They had, remarkably, decided to adopt a little european girl, who went by the name of Kitty. She was 5 and currently running around with the Nakano child.

Suguru was staying next to his wife obstinately, almost scaring away other people, as if he thought they'd return her to the coma. We'd found out it was a coma. Connected to an injury she'd sustained having their last child. We hadn't told her yet, but, because of that, my sister would never have another child. Not that she needed any more! At the current moment, a pair of 10 year old girls were chatting happily to their mother. Yume and Yuka were perfect models of everything that a child should be. Polite, studious, with brains and beauty all together. Just like their mother.

Maiko's boy was nowhere near her, because he was playing with the other children. Shuichi, named after me, was 8 and was the resemblance of trouble. He was a real trickster. But, when it came to studies, he could surpass even his sisters, unlike me. I was a terrible scholar.

Suguru and Maiko actually have another one, called Hitomi, age 2. A bit too young for partying. But, as I look at them all, I can see how much harder it would be on them than me if Maiko died. After all, they were dependamt on her. Unlike me, I just liked the surety that she was there when I needed her. But, I suppose, I never had, and never will, need her like they do.

* * *

HIKARI'S P.O.V.

That bastard! All I can think about is him! I don't want to or think I should believe he is evil, but I have this seething anger about how he acted that creeps up on me when I'm not keeping my feelings in check. I hate that man!

We had this dinner thing at aunt's house to celebrate her release from hospital. Pointless. I hate it all, but father loves it so! The best I can do is play along. So, I did. I sat around, bored stiff for 4 hours, exchanging pleasantries with anyone who bothered to talk to me. Not many, surprisingly. Seemed they were having a good time.

I prefer to be alone, or with my father. Alone, I can listen to my Nittle Grasper cds in peace. But even with my father, I enjoyed myself. We talked about things I was interested in, and he showed a genuine care for my interests.

My main interest being Nittle Grasper. A band that was about 18 years old, yet still running and one of the best around. I listened to them all the time, even though father showed an intense distaste at hearing it.

It was kinda weird, the way my father acted. Whenever he heard my music, he'd fall into a kind of dreamy daze, and jump suddenly a few seconds later, scowling and bitching about my music. It was actually rather entertaining.

But still, I wanted to know why acted like that. It was getting more frustrating, every time he did it. With no answer to that question, I sank back to thinking about Eiri Uesugi. The man was insufferable. I mean, what had he done to dad in the first place? What did dad do before he had me? And why did my dad finally decide to leave? And then there was a task I was setting myself. Oh yes, Eiri wouldn't know what'd hit him. 'You'll get the shock of your life, Eiri Yuki.'

A/N Ta-da! Next chapter is up! I know that Hikari's turned out a little eviller than I planned... but.. I can't help it. Didn't turn out to be too short, so yay! Also, I've come up with a really good reason that Shuichi was pregnant! Which you'll have to wait and find out 'cos I'm not telling you until the time is right. Review please! and I will love you forever! Also, would anyone like to Beta for me! because apparently I need one...


	7. Technical difficulties

**A long lost father. And lover.**

Disclaimer: Not mine, I just manipulate them from time to time... If I owned them, I'd sure as hell be making money from them, but I do neither.

A/N: This will be the shortest chapter yet, I believe. I'm sorry all you people who like the long chapters, but this chapter didn't require much of the story. This chapter is entirely on the net, except for the last paragraph. So, this is my indulgence, writing a chapter in netspeak. I'm very sorry to all who hate net speak, but what I have to say to you is:

This is MY fanfic and I'll do what I like, you got problems, go shove 'em down a privy.

Needed to do that... relaxed now... Errr... all my readers and reviewers... I LOVE YOU! Unless, of course, you're an evil flamer, then I don't love you...

Warnings: Mpreg, as always, swearing, and, for now, that's it. Be alert though, in the next three chapters or so... THIS TURNS M! There will be blazing signs at that point, but for now, T 13+.

Lastly, yahoo mail, england or otherwise, does NOT belong to me! Never ever did! So please don't sue... Also, the spacing is because the computer won't let me write the emails, it just deletes them.

Chapter 7: Technical Difficulties.

To: uesugi. tatsuha tokyomail. co. jp

From: tokyolondongirl yahoo. co. jp

Subject: Private Messenger.

Mr Uesugi,

May I inquire as to whether you have a private messaging service, and if I may contact you over it? I wish to talk to you.

HS.

* * *

To: tokyolondongirl yahoo. co. jp

From: uesugi. tatsuha tokyomail. co. jp

Subject: RE: Private Messenger.

HS,

I do have access to that kind of service. Feel free to contact me, if you ever happen to be on at the same time as me. Also, please, call me Tatsuha.

Tatsuha Uesugi.

* * *

-MotherlessBeauty has logged in- 

-uesugi. tatsuha tokyomail. co. jphas been added to your contact list.-

-SakumaLover has logged in.-

MotherlessBeauty: Hello, Mr Uesugi.

SakumaLover: Please, feel free to call me Tatsuha. So, what did you wish to discuss?

MotherlessBeauty: I wish to discuss a certain person with you.

SakumaLover: And whom would that be?

MotherlessBeauty: Your brother.

SakumaLover: Is that right? Why?

MotherlessBeauty: Do you really need to know? It is really my concern only.

SakumaLover: Well, you're one of my concerns, Hikari.

MotherlessBeauty: Awww, shit! You know?

SakumaLover: Yes. Correct.

MotherlessBeauty: Geez... there goes that plan...

SakumaLover: It's not that hard. You have no mother, you've lived in Tokyo and London, and your initials are HS. Those are the pieces of information that your email and messenger name provided.

MotherlessBeauty: Errr.. Yeah.. I forgot about that...

SakumaLover: So what do you want to know?

MotherlessBeauty: Like I said, I wanna talk about my father.

SakumaLover: Hang on, I thought you wanted to talk about Eiri? Plus, I can't tell you all that much about Shuichi you don't know.

MotherlessBeauty: I do want to talk about Eiri.

SakumaLover: Ahhh... You know, don't you?

MotherlessBeauty: Yes. A little bit at least..

SakumaLover: So... whadd'ya wanna know?

MotherlessBeauty: I want to know what Eiri did to my father.

SakumaLover: Why should I tell you?

MotherlessBeauty: Because it concerns me far more than it concerns you.

SakumaLover: Good point...

MotherlessBeauty: So, will you tell me? I mean, the WHOLE story?

SakumaLover: I suppose so. But don't tell your father, or he'll get annoyed.

MotherlessBeauty: ...?

SakumaLover: It's too long a story to relay now. Plus, I don't know it all...

MotherlessBeauty: Okay. Hey, Tatsuha, what is Eiri's email?

SakumaLover: yuki. eiri tokyomail. co. jpWhy?

MotherlessBeauty: Just wondering...

-You have added yuki. eiri tokyomail. co. jpto your contact list.-

-SingleMan has logged in.-

-You have been blocked by SingleMan.-

MotherlessBeauty: FUCK HIM!

SakumaLover: Whom do you refer to?

MotherlessBeauty: My darling Daddy.

SakumaLover: Y'know, many women have, and still do. Shuichi was the only man though.

MotherlessBeauty: Ewwww... Did NOT need to know that...

SakumaLover: Rest of Japan does, so why not?

MotherlessBeauty: Because most 15yr old girls do NOT want to associate their parents with sex.

SakumaLover: There' not much else you can associate him with, unless you're interested in romance novels.

MotherlessBeauty: Lovely... Look, I need to talk to you in person.

SakumaLover: I'm free tomorrow.

MotherlessBeauty: Sounds good.

SakumaLover: I'll come to your house.

MotherlessBeauty: See you then, uncle Tatsuha.

-You have logged out.-

* * *

-SingleMan has logged in.- 

SingleMan: Hey, Tatsuha.

SakumaLover: Yo.

SingleMan: SakumaLover?

SakumaLover: SingleMan?

SingleMan: Very well, be that way.

SakumaLover: I will be. So...

SingleMan: WHAT?

SakumaLover: Well, I was wondering if you'd thought about it.

SingleMan: About what?

SakumaLover: Well, what I told you...

SingleMan: Nope. I've been fucking this random girl instead.

SakumaLover: Fuck you!

SingleMan: Oh, she already has, many times...

SakumaLover: Bastard.

SingleMan: Child molesting creep. I still remember the time you tried to do the brat.

SakumaLover: Sounds like someone's a bit protective. Anyway, he was older than me.

SingleMan: Me? Protective?

SakumaLover: You. No-one else here to talk to.

SingleMan: I couldn't give a shit.

SakumaLover: Oh, go fuck yourself, you jerk! Before I block you, understand, you've blocked out your only daughter! The closest family you have, and you've lost it. I hope she hates you for the rst of your life, because I certainly will.

-You have blocked SingleMan-

-LostSoul has logged in.-

LostSoul: Hey, Tatsuha.

SakumaLover: Hey Shu-chan. How are Maiko and Suguru?

LostSoul: Everything's great. As you know, she came home yesterday. Suguru, Yume, Yuka and little Shu-chan are all really happy. They've all been so excited about her recovery.

SakumaLover: And...?

LostSoul: Huh?

SakumaLover: How are you?

LostSoul: Oh, I'm great.

SakumaLover: You sure? How's Hikari?

LostSoul: Hikari's a bit quieter than usual, I suppose...

SakumaLover: Tell me, truly, how you are!

LostSoul: Okay... I'll tell you... I'm feeling kinda lonely and unhappy right now. It's like everyone else has got someone to be with, and even Hikari's abandoned me... Y'know, I haven't had anyone since I left Eiri, and as I've said before, 'sometimes the night's just a bit toolong.'

Shuichi leaned back in his chair, gazing thoughtfully at the computer. 'Do you feel lonely too, Eiri?'

A/N: Done! Ta-da!beautiful new chapter of self indulgence! bows Please review! grovels Please! Please! I'll love you forever and shower you with cookies! Last note: The quote is taken from the first volume of the manga, and I don't own it! So, don't sue!


	8. Pieces of an uncompleted puzzle

**A long lost father. And lover.**

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be... I just... Play with them from time to time.

A/N: What notes are there? Err... rather short chapter this time, folks. You don't have to read this chapter if you've read the first five or so volumes of the manga. It's all just recap, after all. But, if you're interested in seeing the whole story from Tatsuha's P.O.V, read on!

Thankyou, the few of you who reviewed my last chapter, totalling approx. 5 people! Everyone else, I don't like you! Where are my reviews! Those who reviewed, here are your cookies! The ones who didn't, none for you! I want reviews! I didn't write this fic for nothing you know!

Warnings: Er... Mpreg, swearing, mentions of attempted rape! I dunno...

Chapter 8: Pieces of an uncompleted puzzle. (Last minute author's note! Woah! Really long chapter name for, like, the shortest chapter...)

HIKARI'S P.O.V.

I was waiting anxiously outside grandma's house, hopping from foot to foot, peering along the length of the deserted street. My mind was a whirl, I was thinking of thousands of different things, yet, they all centered around one person. Eiri Yuki.

I looked, yet again, my eyes searching for a single person along the quiet way. But I saw no-one. Not even the person I was looking for. I glanced at the windows on the second floor, checking to see if my father had noticed that I was waiting for someone. If he found out who I was meeting, he'd stop it even before it had begun. Not to protect me from a man who might take advantage of me, but because he didn't want me talking to Tatsuha privately.

Shifting my gaze back down to the street, I spotted Tatsuha strolling lazily along. I ran to him, waving my arms eagerly. I yelled his name as well, I think. When I reached him, we hugged briefly. After I let him go, I bent over, panting heavily, my hands on my knees.

"Hello- Tatsuha." I said between gasps.

"Hi." He said promptly, then, with a rather evil grin on his face, said, "Why don't you address me properly, considering you know now and all?"

I grumbled incoherently. Just like him to remember something like that and take advantage of it. "Of course, _uncle._" I tried to stress the last word, showing how irritating he was, but it didn't work. I grinned mischievously before grabbing his arm and pulling him behind me.

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V.

"This is the park where I met him." Hikari's voice was calm and soft, betraying no idea of her emotions on the matter as she walked arm in arm along the path with her uncle.

"Shuichi, also, met my brother here. He told me it was so." Tatsuha's voice was soft as well, soft and reverent. As if awed by the power of the place they were walking around. He led Hikari swiftly to a bench and sat down, pulling her with him.

"Will you tell me, uncle?"

"I'll tell you what I know." Tatsuha smiled at his niece. "Because I certainly don't know it all."

"Okay." Hikari nodded understandingly. "Please, begin."

"Surprisingly enough, I know the beginning of events. I know that Shuichi, for instance, met Eiri in his last year of high school. As I understand, Eiri was walking through this park when a piece of paper came towards him on the wind. He caught it, and read it. Apparently it contained the most god-awful song lyrics my brother had ever seen. Well, when Eiri looked up, he asked if they were his and then told him he should give up and find a job. The exact wording, I've heard, is hilarious, from my brother's point of view. After the meeting, I don't know the story for a period of time. Then, a month or 2 later, Eiri pulled out one of the biggest shockers ever!"

"Were they gonna get married or something?" Hikari guessed avidly.

"Nah, never." Tatsuha grinned evilly at the girl, then said, "He came home!"

"He came home? That's it?" Hikari burst into mock rage. "You had me all worked up for nothing!"

Tatsuha grinned evilly once again, then continued to speak. "It's a huge thing when you're talking about Eiri. He hates father so much that he changed his name. And the big thing is, apparently he came home because Shuichi told him to!"

"Keep on going." Hikari encouraged quietly.

"Well, he left pretty soon after he came, because he got a phone call from his editor. After that, I didn't get much news of their relationship, but Mika was under the impression they were screwing each other. So, about 3 months after Eiri came home, Eiri's fiancé, Ayaka, went missing-."

"AYAKA! YOU MEAN...!" Hikari lowered her voice. "Ayaka Nakano?"

"Yup, that's right. She was engaged to Eiri, but it was arranged, and Eiri didn't want it. So, when she realised she could never win against Shuichi, she went for Nakano, who had it big time for her. Well, Ayako ran away to Tokyo to see Eiri, so I was sent to find her. While I was there I stopped off at my brother's house. Shuichi turned up. Actually, the events of that night were pretty funny..."

"Tell me, please uncle!" Hikari begged him, trying, and failing, to look pitiful.

"It's okay, I'll tell you. Well, Shuichi has always borne a certain resemblance to Ryuichi Sakuma, the man I've been 'joined' to for the past 5 years. At this time, I didn't even know Ryu-chan, but when I met Shuichi, I thought it might be interesting to have a bit of roleplay... Well, really, to cut a long story short, I ended up trying to screw him on the living room floor. Didn't work though, Eiri walked in on me..."

Hikari was bent over, and had been for some time now, laughing hysterically at what he was saying. "Too... Funny... Can't stop... laugh..." She said in between gasps for air.

Tatsuha smiled, amused by her reaction. "_Anyway._" Tatsuha cleared his throat loudly. "Let's get back on track. The next big event was when he yelled 'YUKI IS MINE' in a concert-"

"Tatsuha, what do you mean con-" Hikari tried to speak, but he silenced her.

"Quiet. Question time after the story. So, he yelled it, at his first official concert, in fact. The story was really funny to hear." Tatsuha rubbed his nose thoughtfully. "Errr... What happened next was that Eiri sent Shuichi packing. I hear he was pretty down afterwards, couldn't do anything at all. He was a real mess. Then, for some strange reason, he took him back again."

"Tatsuha-" Hikari tried to speak again.

"NO" Tatsuha placed a hand on her mouth. "Question time at the END of the story. Anyway, next thing that happens is that Eiri goes back to Kyoto under the pretense that he's going to marry Ayaka. Of course, it turned out to not be the case. I know the particulars, because I was involved in getting Shuichi there and swapping him with Ayaka. And when Shuichi came into the room in this terrible orange dress, all Eiri had to say was; 'Even the sailor's costume was better than this'."

Hikari giggled. Quickly she put a hand over her mouth, silencing herself.

"Apparently, my brother told Shuichi about his time in America to make him go away. Didn't work though." Tatsuha seemed to be staring at something that wasn't there.

Hikari smiled. "What happened in America?"

"It's not my business to tell. If you want to know, you'll have to ask the man whose memory it is. Beside that, nothing much happened. About a year later, he turned up on our doorstep in Kyoto, 6 months pregnant, with blonde hair and brown eyes. I didn't recognise him until he told me who he was. Then he collapsed on the doorstep. Next morning, news came out that he'd been missing for a week."

Hikari smiled. She'd never thought her father would be capable of that. She was pretty sure being 6 months would be very helpful.

"Well, that's about it, I suppose. He had you in Kyoto general hospital 3 months later, lived in Kyoto, the place he could be most assured Eiri wouldn't go, for a further 8 years, then travelled to England to assure anonymity."

"So, why does father hate Nittle Grasper?" Hikari spoke thoughtfully. "And, what do you mean by his first concert? My dad isn't musical. Is he?"

"Your father was as great a Nittle Grasper fan as any. He seemed to love their music second only to how much he loved Eiri. The reason he doesn't like listening anymore? Probably because he doesn't like the memories it brings back. He put away his past to protect you and himself. That also relates to your second question. Shuichi is musical, at least, he was." Tatsuha thought carefully how to phrase it. "He was the lead singer in an extremely popular band called Bad Luck. He was good at writing melodies, and had some of the genius of impromptu song writing in him. Your father's friend, Nakano, was the guitarist. Your uncle, Suguru, was the keyboardist. They disbanded when he had you, so that you wouldn't know about what happened."

Hikari looked down at the ground, pensively. 'I want to know everything that has been hidden from me.' Looking up at the sky, she concentrated on the image in her head. 'And I will, Eiri Yuki.'

A/N Okay, so it turned out to be a lot longer than I thought it would... Last notes.. Yes... there's a quote from the anime there, as well as all the scenes from the manga. If I've made mistakes, tell me! A last explanation I thought I owed you. If you're wondering about name transitions, from uesugi - yuki, let me explain.

Shuichi- calls him eiri nowadays. Uses uesugi as an insult because he knows he hates it.

Hikari- uses first and last names most of the time. Refuses to call him uesugi, because her name is uesugi shindou, and calls him yuki, as if saying she does not acknowledge him as her father.


	9. Life and death

**A long lost father. And lover.**

Disclaimer: Not mine, and no financial gain whatsoever.

A/N Hello! Yet another chapter of my apparently dreary fanfic... I'm sorry I've been so long, but I just couldn't be bothered to type it up... Well... notes... I've used stuff from the manga again... Not much to say, really.. Err... cookies for all who reviewed!

IMPORTANT A/N! Hey! the fic's been reposted, because they kicked it off, for something in the first chapter that I got rid of long ago. So, it's back up, so that I can finish the story. AND, whoever the evil flamer is who decided to dob in my story, even though the bad things were taken out, YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY EVIL! and i don't like you. Anyway, It's back up now, my lovely story!

Warning: M-Mpreg, character death, swearing...what have I had before?

Chapter 9: Birth and death.

SHUICHI'S P.O.V.

Three weeks. Three more wonderful weeks of bliss with my little sister, then back to England. Back to our little townhouse in the city. I had enjoyed my time after Maiko's recovery wholeheartedly, but I was glad to be returning to the place I now called home.

Hikari, I think, wasn't looking forward to returning. And who could blame her? In Japan, she had grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins and old friends. Even though going home was what I wanted, I wasn't sure if it was the best for her.

She had a complicated enough childhood as it was. It just seemed so cruel to take her away, yet again. During those three weeks, I was so wrapped up in my thoughts, I lost sight of the things in front of me. Until they fell in my face.

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V. 

The house was quiet. Dead silent. A strange thing for the house of a family at four-thirty in the afternoon.

Shuichi knocked on the door. Waiting for an answer, he looked around the garden, noting that the flowers needed watering. When there was no reply after three minutes, he knocked again. After trying three times, he tried the doorknob.

It was open, so he walked into the cool building, the acclimated air brushing his skin as he walked into the hall. "Hello?" His voice echoed around the empty room, penetrating the silence. "Maiko? Suguru?" H treaded slowly into the living room. "Yume? Yuka?"

He walked slowly towards the kitchen, and entered silently, his eyes slowly sweeping the room. His heart nearly stopped at what he found.

Maiko was lying on the floor, not even moving.

* * *

EIRI'S P.O.V. 

There was a battle going on inside my head. Yes. No. Yes. No. It just couldn't make up its mind. The choices were quite simple, actually. I could, a, go to Kyoto, or, b, not. If I stayed, there was Tatsuha, with his new-found vendetta against me. On the other hand,

Kyoto meant being forced into the clutches of my recently widowed sister, who seemed to think, now that bloody Tohma was dead, she had to find someone else to take care of. Ta-da! She thought of me.

Surprisingly enough, being babied by Mika seemed like the easier option. Anything to ensure separation from that damn kid!

* * *

SHUICHI'S P.O.V. 

I could feel the tears on my cheeks as I fell down next to my sister's lifeless body. I think cried out, then I grabbed her, holding her tight against my chest. My tears fell down on her head, wetting her light brown hair. I kissed her, whispering softly to her, encouraging her to wake.

I tried to tell myself she was only sleeping, but my heart already knew she was dead, because it could feel the emptiness where she usually occupied. I cried out again, letting out the anguish I was now feeling. I could feel that I was going to faint, but before I did, I saw Hikari run into the room, horror writtenall over her face.

* * *

EIRI'S P.O.V. 

When I arrived in Kyoto, I didn't even bother looking for my sister. I knew she'd find me somehow. Bloody git. She could always find me. Anyway, I wasn't thinking about finding her, but what she would make me do. I was expecting her to drive me home, put me to sleep and then take me to the doctor.

I was right. Except she didn't let me sleep first. That's how I found myself at Kyoto general hospital at three pm, being checked by a random doctor I'd never met before. He chatted happily to me about this and that, but I wasn't paying attention, until he said something that made me sit up straight.

"... Was visited yesterday by the man who had the male pregnancy 15 years ago. Lovely man. Came to thank me for all my help in the birth, when, really, I didn't do that much. Said he'd come visiting because he'd just got back to the country recently."

"Th-this man!" I almost shouted the words, standing abruptly as well. "What was his name?"

"Ummm... What was it?" He mumbled the words to the floor, looking at it thoughtfully. "Err... It was... Ah! Yes! Shindou! The man's name was Shindou."

I sat down quickly before my legs would give way. "Shindou..." I whispered, not sure what to say.

"Yes, Shindou. Orr was it Shiitake?" I looked up at the man, raising an eyebrow. He flinched slightly at the gesture.

"Can you tell me anything about this pregnancy?" I stood again. Sure that this timemy legswould hold out.

* * *

SHUICHI'S P.O.V. 

My cheeks were wet, and my eyes were sore. It had been a mere hour since I had walked into the room to find Maiko, dead, on the floor. But yet, I felt like I'd cried more then ever before in that short time.

The doctors' report said she had died of natural causes, with no harm inflicted by an outside source. She died of cardiac arrest, brought on by the weakening effects of the coma and exhaustion from the stressful amount of work she had put upon herself. Her body just couldn't take it.

I was realising I couldn't take it either. Little Shu-chan had come home to the sight of his mother and uncle on the floor. He'd screamed so loud that I'd woken, then he'd run to me, and started sobbing in my lap. He was there now, sobbing so pathetically that it was driving me insane.

Thinking of him led to thinking of Suguru. Whatever would he do? He couldn't take care of the kids without Maiko. They might be taken from him, or they could be killed. I would never be able to bear that loss. We had all just had too much pain to stand it. I hugged Shu-chan closer to my chest, with the intention of never letting go.

* * *

EIRI'S P.O.V. 

I was sitting in the hospital director's office, then man himself sitting sternly across a desk from me. The room was plain, almost to the point of boring, and the figure in front of me was even more so.

"Dr Tamago tells me that you're interested in the male pregnancy we delivered fifteen years ago, Mr Yuki." He seemed to be trying to smile kindly at me, but it looked like a grimace.

"Yes, I am." Of course I was! What did he take me for? A conman? When I said I wanted something, I wanted it.

"I see..." I would've betted myself 10000 yen he didn't. "Well, we have extensive records and research you can read, or I can detail the theories for you." He leaned forward on his desk, placing his chin on his hands.

"I don't have the time to go through the reports, unfortunately, so could you summarise them for me?" I smiled an emotionless smile at him.

He mumbled something about self-important writers who had no time to read, then said loudly and pompously; "I can give you the details of the case." After speaking, he puffed out his chest like a parrot.

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V. 

"The case started just over fifteen years ago," He spoke slowly, as if Eiri wouldn't understand him if he didn't. "Wen a twenty year old man, named Shindou, Shuichi, came to the hospital exactly nine months pregnant. The first thing we can hypothesise is that, if another man falls pregnant, he will also have an exact pregnancy.

"The man delivered the baby through his anal tracht, which must have been connected to the womb. The father and child were healthy, and the delivery went well."

"What did he name the child?" Eiri gazed steadily at the man.

"The child was named Hikari. Now, after this point we go onto guesswork. Our theory is similar to the idea of pseudocyesis, or phantom pregnancy, in which a woman shows all the signs of pregnancy, but is not pregnant. This is a more advanced form, we believe.

"We believe that, if a man's hormones have enough oestrogen, and if he believes he can have a child, and he also wants a child, that his body will start giving him the equipment, because, it would now believe he was in fact female. So, the body would produce ovum, a womb, and fallopian tubes, all accessing the anus.

"Then, if he had anal sex at the right time any month afterwards, he could possibly become pregnant through these means." He finished his speech gravely, looking so serious that Eiri wanted to laugh.

"The conception, what date was it?" Eiri continued to look directly at the man.

"July, the 28th, almost sixteen years ago." Eiri blushed profusely at hearing this, looking downwards. He remembered that night, as it had been the last with Shuichi. He'd left a month later.

"Do you know the father?" Eiri forced himself to look up at the man.

"No. He didn't want the man knowing, so he refused to tell us."

'That bloody kid! He didn't want me to know about my kid!' Eiri fumed inside, insulted at the lack of trust the boy had in him. He'd hid the girl for fifteen years, never letting him know anything, leaving Eiri to find out for himself. Excusing himself, he left the building quickly, bristling with anger.

The hospital director watched him go, a genuine smile tugging at his face. "Well, we didn't know before, but we certainly do now. Don't we, Mr Yuki?"

A/N Sorry again for the long wait! I'm sorry I'm such a lazy bum! And there's a quote from the manga there, if you can find it... he he...


	10. The biggest mistake

**A long lost father and lover.**

Disclaimer: These characters are not mine, but occasionally I take them out and play with them.

A/N: This is a very conflicting chapter and also the chapter that turns this NC-17. I would most seriously suggest that, if you don't want to read about homosexual hot and passionate sex, you don't read this chapter. I will, however, put a summary at the end for those who would like to know any other going ons in this chapter. Full warnings below.

Warnings: Swearing, M-preg, fellatio, malexmale penetration.

Chapter 10: The biggest mistake.

SHUICHI'S P.O.V.

The tears rolled freely down my face. I couldn't stop them. They just kept coming. And somehow, I didn't want to stop them. Little Shu-chan was standing beside me, the tears evident from his red eyes and nose. Even though I didn't want to stop, I wanted him to.

Hikari was on my other side, and as far as I could tell, she didn't seem sad at all. There were no tears, there was no downcast look on her face, just a cold mask of indifference. I didn't understand it, but I suddenly felt like hitting her. She was so calm, so collected, while the rest of us mere mortals were crying our hearts out. It was wrong, it was unlike her.

As I watched them lower the coffin into the crypt, I had made up my mind. I was sure it was the right step. I had decided. We were going to leave Japan, this country of sorrows. Me, and Hikari, and my nephew Shu-chan, and we were never coming back to the sadness of our past. True, I would miss it terribly, but at least in England I was happy. Unlike this hell.

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V.

Shuichi and Hiroshi were at the 5th bar for that night, and they were pretty smashed. Though Shuichi had drunk the most, he had drunk so much that less was still a pretty big amount. 'This will make the pain go away.' Shuichi would think as he downed another glass, vodka, then beer, then whisky, then scotch. It didn't matter what it was, as long as it replaced that gaping hole he could feel inside.

Hiroshi would actually look at his friend from time to time and think that he'd had enough, but that stopped pretty quickly once he had downed a couple of standard drinks. Finally, he stood up, stumbling. "Shui.. Chi. I -hic- think we sho-hic-uld go to a -hic- home"

Shuichi tried to stand, but only managed to fall to the floor. "Ithangyarigh, made." He held up a hand for help and when Hiroshi had Shuichi's hand around his shoulder.

They walked to Shuichi's childhood home, just a few blocks away, and knocked on the door. When Mrs Shindou opened the door, they went to the stairs and started to haul themselves up, stumbling slightly along the way.

While they climbed the stairs, Shuichi leaned on Hiroshi, needing his support to stand. "Why, Hiro, why?" His voice seemed so fragile to Hiroshi.

"Dunno." Hiroshi shrugged, and Shuichi lost his grip falling to the ground yet again. Hiroshi held out his hand, again.

"Thanks, Hiro, thanks for bein' there." Shuichi grabbed the offered hand and propelled himself into his friends arms and looked directly into his friend's eyes. His next actions were completely automatic and took Hiroshi completely by surprise.

* * *

HIROSHI'S P.O.V.

We were looking into each others eyes when he leaned forward and planted his mouth on mine, kissing me forcefully. My mouth fell open in surprise, and he took advantage of it to push his tongue into to my mouth and rub it against the roof of my mouth. He tasted just like the weird pink flavour of strawberry pocky, as well as the beer he had imbibed earlier.

My first instinct was to push him away, but as his tongue entered my mouth, the alcohol started to run my system and told me to go along for the ride, so I did. It was something I'd always wanted, until he met Yuki, for him to kiss me like this, with the need, the feeling that he needed just me.

I started to return the kiss, my right hand coming up to grasp his head while the other ventured towards his buttocks. I rubbed my tongue against his and then pulled away when I heard his mother call us. I pulled him up and dragged him to his bedroom. I turned the knob and was instantaneously attacked by him, pushing me through the door with his weight. I turned him around and slammed the door behind us, kissing him passionately all the time.

We fell on the bed and came together again straight away. While kissing him, I pulled his thin singlet top upwards, parting us for seconds while I ripped it off. All the while, he worked on the buttons of my shirt. When his flesh was exposed, I ran my fingers along his chest, instigating the most delighful noises from him. I pulled his belt off, then his trousers, rolling him over so that I was on top. It felt better than anything I'd felt in ages, being skin to skin with the only person I ever truly wanted, who seemed to be wanting me too, if his erection was anything to go by.

Taking my attention away from his mouth, I traced a line down his neck, nipping and sucking, slowly working further and further. I could feel the goosebumps on his skin wherever I touched him. I continued down my path, my journey accompanied by his encouraging groans. "Fuck, yes..." I could hear him whisper to me, his voice full of ecstasy.

Finally reaching his cock, I licked the tip, tasting the precome. I slid my tongue along the length, and almost came from the noises he made. I took his entire cock in my mouth and started to suck, eliciting those wonderful moans again and again. He came in my mouth, and I swallowed it, relishing in the wonderful salty taste.

Rising up, I kissed him softly, before preparing him, sliding a finger deep inside, pulling out slowly, then ramming again. When he was ready I slid into him and started to fuck him, hard and slow. Soon, I had built up speed and was ramming into him. I felt the intense heat of his body and I exploded into ecstasy. The last thing I could remember was coming inside of him before I drifted off into a pleasant sleep.

* * *

SHUICHI'S P.O.V.

When I woke up, I felt extremely uncomfortable. When I tried to move, I realised that Hiroshi was lying on the bed behind me, peacefully sleeping. I didn't understand why, until I suddenly remembered last night, that he and I had... I blushed profusely at the thought.

I looked around for my clothing, and noticed it was in a heap on the floor. I edged slowly off the bed, trying to avoid waking my best friend, when my dooe banged open and Hikari walked into the room.

"Hello Dad! Grandma told me you were here and I want-" Her words were cut short when she saw us on the bed. She took a step backwards. "Dad... That's..." She closed her eyes, then opened them, I could see the tears escaping. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'D DO THIS!"

"Hikari, I-" I tried to explain, but she just shook her head, staring at me as though I'd hit her. I stopped trying to speak, after all, the position said all. Hiroshi sat up next to me, and the look on his face was one of horror at being discovered.

"And you, uncle Hiroshi!" She ran to the door and looked behind her regretfully. "Don't talk to me, I don't want to talk to either of you right now.

* * *

HIKARI'S P.O.V.

That bastard! I hated him! What did he think he was doing? I knew what I was going to do now, and he wouldn't be happy about it, but I had to do it. For myself. Because my world was falling apart! Because of Shuichi Shindou and Eiri Yuki!

Yeah, overview..

Shuichi attends Maiko's funeral. That night, he and Hiroshi get drunk, and end up having sex in Shuichi's bedroom. Next morning, Hikari walks in on them, and get really pissed off. She gets really angry and walks out. She then has a little talk to herself...

That's about it, really...


	11. Meeting, leaving

**A long lost father and lover.**

Disclaimer: Not mine, never was, no profit.

Warnings: Yes... warnings... swearing, m-preg, shonen-ai, unhappiness, previous character death, and yes, the characters are STILL dead.

A/N: Well, chapter 11. The second last proper chapter. (I might do some weird spin-off shit later... and you never know... I could do a sequel!) In the moonlight is from the gravitation OAV, and it is NOT mine! Never wrote, never owned rights for it, and never profited from it. The translation is courtesy of So, don't sue! As well, I stole yet another bit from the english manga translation, so, don't sue me for that one either. Tokyo train station is a real place, and it's where all the long distance shinkansen come from. It is possible to catch a shinkansen from kyoto to tokyo, and it takes less than an hour... I think... Another note, There's a semi-insult on gay people later on... please! Don't believe those are my views. The comments just what I'd expect Eiri to think, and I mean no offense to anyone by it. Besides, I'm lesbian...

Chapter 11: Meeting, leaving.

Shuichi groaned. He did not want to go into the conspicuously large, busy and loud restaurant that he was being dragged into. He did not want to eat an expensive, yet tasteless, dinner, and he most certainly did not want to partake in aforesaid actions in the company of his friends and family.

Nevertheless, there he was. Being painfully, ever so slowly, dragged along by his enragingly persistent daughter, into aforementioned restaurant.

"Tell me again, why am I doing this?" He moaned loudly to his daughter, hopeful to deter her from her current actions.

"Because, oh father dear," He could see a glint in her eye as she spoke the words of condemnation, "you promised me. Promised me you'd do _anything_. Remember?"

Of course he remembered. How could he not remember? And how much he regretted it. But, he had been desperate to make amends after the fiasco with Hiro. He grimaced painfully at the memory.

Hikari grinned, satisfied at the expression on his face, and sure he wouldn't try to escape like he did while getting into the cab. Shuichi saw the expression, and felt a great sense of foreboding coming upon himself.

"Very well." He spoke calmly, yet inside he was filled with dread. "The show must go on."

He didn't hear the faint whisper behind him as he marched dutifully through the door. "Why, yes... It must."

* * *

EIRI'S P.O.V.

I was not doing it. I simply refused to believe that I had agreed to it. I was not going to some random dinner with my brother that had forced me to travel back into Tokyo, despite wanting to stay as far away as possible. The asshole had even made me catch the shinkansen, for fuck's sake.

Said asshole was also running late to pick me up from Tokyo train station. The bastard.

He was definitely on the death list.

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V.

Shuichi was amazed at the size of the group of people Hikari had summoned to their 'Goodbye Japan' dinner. Hiroshi and Ayaka, of course. Ryuichi, Noriko, Mika, his mother, Suguru, and, for some weird reason, Sakano and Mr. K.

He thought it strange that people she didn't even know, had been invited. After a moment of silence, he moved forward to begin greeting them, and regretted it.

In an instant, a fully cocked and loaded magnum .44 was aimed at his head. A deep voice sounded in his ear. "What do you have to say for yourself about that disappearing act you pulled off 15 years ago?"

"Ummm..." Shuichi gulped.

"Time's running out! 5... 4... 3..."

"Ummm..."

"2..."

"I'm... sorry?" He squeaked, glancing nervously at his ex-manager.

"Your answer was not funny enough!" Exclaimed the madman with the gun, who than proceeded to assault Shuichi's person in the most unexpected way.

He hugged him.

* * *

EIRI'S P.O.V.

I was still waiting at Tokyo station an hour after my train had arrived. I was pretty bored. I had, unfortunately, run out of curses to use on that bastard I used to call my brother. And used them all more than once too. I tried to amuse myself by chatting up the closest women. But it didn't work. None of them were remotely sexy. Their breasts just weren't that big. What a turn off...

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V.

Dinner was winding down, and the crowd at the table reserved under the name Shindou were enjoying the live band onstage. They all sat silently, their heads turned to the young musicians. Shuichi sighed. The band was a singer, a guitarist, and a man on a keyboard. Just like theirs had been. He smiled to himself before continuing with his dessert.

At the end of the song, Hikari stood. Ducking her head to avoid attention, she ran quickly to the stage and started whispering into the singer's ear. He blushed slightly, before nodding slightly and grinning.

Shuichi watched the entirety of the exchange, a feeling of foreboding yet again foreshadowing him. When the singer blushed, he grimaced. 'She's such a pathological flirt...' He thought grimly. 'It definitely comes from Eiri.'

"Hey, everybody!" The singer spoke into the microphone after straightening up. "It seems we've got a very special guest tonight!" There was a mass of clapping from the assembled diners. Shuichi shrunk back in his seat, almost sure of his fate. "Now... May introduce to you, for the first time in 15 years, returned finally to Japan from rainy England, the lead singer of superstar pop group, Bad Luck, Shuichi Shindou!"

Oh. She was dead.

* * *

SHUICHI'S P.O.V.

I was going to kill her. That is, after she told me how she'd found out so much about what happened before she was born. I ran straight to her, glaring my fiercest glare, but she stared blankly back at me.

"Hello, father dearest." She smiled her cool smile. "Now, up on the stage with you. And if you're quick, Hiro and Suguru can accompany you. Don't keep everyone waiting.!" She gestured grandly towards the stage with her hands, curtseying slightly, and flashing me the evillest grin yet.

"You cruel, heartless, b-" My words were cut off by a hand covering my mouth. I glanced behind me to see Hiro restricting my breathing. I tried to tell him to get off, but all that was heard was a muffled grunt.

"I don't think we want to hear the end of that word. Do we, Shuichi?" He raised an eyebrow at me, and I nodded warily. He removed the offending hand, smiling. "So?"

"Very well then." I turned so I could see Suguru. "You guys ready to rock?"

* * *

EIRI'S P.O.V.

I glared at Tatsuha as he drove towards me on his motorcycle. He smiled innocently before dismounting. "Why Eiri! So glad you could come, old chap!" Fucking queer.

"I'm not." I grumbled, still pissed about the wait. "Why didn't you bring a car?"

"I like my bike better." The fucking bastard. "Come, food calls to my empty stomach."

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V. (Listen to 'in the moonlight' in this scene...)

Shuichi stood on the stage, eyes closed, listening to the slow introduction of the song. The song that he had written, the song that he had written to his express the love he felt at the time. The love ha had felt for a man who was reflected everyday in his daughter's eyes. When the time came, he held the mic to his mouth, and sang, pouring his heart and soul into every note.

_ORENJI iro tsuki yoru ga kuruto kimi no koto o omoi dasu_

When an orange-colored moonlit night comes, I think of you

Hikari watched her father reverently, tears glistening in her eyes. She could see the longing in his face, hear the love and desperation in his voice, and, somehow, she knew it was all for Yuki.

_kakko tsuketa ore no SERIFU wa hoka no dare kano SERIFU de_

as though the chic affectations in my words were someone else's words.

Hiro gazed at Ayaka as he slowly strummed his guitar. He had told her all of what he had done, and she had forgiven him. Their love was not lost, and they would not risk seperation, for their childrens' sake. The would move on, and forget.

_fui ni miageru SHIRUETTO kimi no yokogao o terashita awai hikari wa ima demo_

Even now, (I can remember) the pale light that illuminated your silhouette as you suddenly glanced up (at that night's sky).

Suguru lost himself in his keyboard. In the tips of his fingers, as they gently padded the keys. He let all his emotions go. The loneliness, the sorrow, and the despair. He washed it all away. And at that moment, he felt peace.

_nani o matteru kimi wa inai hey tokei dake ga ashi oto no youni nemurenai mune ni hibiku_

What is it I'm waiting for, in this room without you - it's just the clock's ticking, but it resonates in my sleepless heart like the sound of footsteps.

Tatsuha beamed as he walked through the door. That girl was a genius. He could see Shuichi singing on stage as planned. He turned slowly, and beckoned Eiri into the room.

_ima mo matteru hitori tomatteru futari mita anohi no tsuki o ima dokode kimi wa miteru_

Even now I'm waiting; I stop here alone. From where do you now see the moon we saw together on that day?

Eiri could hear the music coming from inside the building. As Tatsuha beckoned him in, he had the feeling he had heard it all before. He walked quickly through the door, and upon sight of the person upon the stage, stopped. He could recognise him even with brown hair and eyes.

The music stopped abruptly as the singer opened his eyes to see the newcomers. He gasped, dropping the microphone, which hit the ground with a screech. "Eiri... Yuki..."

"Still as crap as always, brat. Your song writing sucks." Eiri stared at him, eyes completely cold.

"What...?" Shuichi seemed to have lost speech upon seeing him.

"You've got no talent! You should just give up! You're wasting your life." Eiri couldn't believe what he was saying. His heart was beating wildly, and he wanted to go and sweep him up, but his cool side was taking over.

"You're one to talk!" Shuichi was red now, angered by the harsh words.

"And what does that mean?"

"Come here, and I'll tell you!"

"If you wanna talk, you can come here instead, idiot."

Perhaps because Eiri had said idiot, Shuichi stomped straight to him. "Fine! You wanna know what my meaning is?" Yuki stared at him, amazed by the violence. "I mean, screwing everything that moves and has a vagina! I mean locking me out when it was raining! I mean hurting me emotionally until I felt like I was bleeding inside! I mean ignoring me as if I was a particle of dust! I mean getting but never giving! I mean giving me no love, right from the beginning! That's what I mean, you cold, uncaring bastard!"

Eiri was pretty shocked about what was being hurled at him. He had no idea how the kid had managed to bottle all that up for 15 years. As soon as Shuichi spoke again, he feigned disinterestedness.

"I'm talking about crying myself to sleep every night for 15 years, because I could never look forward to the next day. Because, I loved someone. Someone who had always hated me. Goodbye Eiri. I'm leaving Japan to never come back, so don't expect to see me again. I'll do it just like last time we parted." Shuichi wrapped his left arm around Eiri's neck and pulled himself up. When their heads were level, he kissed him forcefully and passionately. With tears leaking out of his closed eyes. "That's because I love you." He whispered, before biting Eiri's lower lip. Stepping away, he raised his right hand, and slapped him as hard as he could. "And that's because you couldn't love me! I hope we won't meet again, Uesugi."

Once he had finished, he grabbed his daughters hand, and rushed out the door, pushing Tatsuha out of the way.

* * *

EIRI'S P.O.V.

I stood still as he forcefully kissed me. I stood paralyzed as he spat out the hateful words. I hardly noticed as he hit me. I wasn't paying attention. I was staring at those beautiful eyes, the slight amounts of purple that just escaped the brown, the tears glistening on the lashes. How I longed to wipe those tears away, but I couldn't. Not after what he had described.

I felt my heart stop. My body must have been falling to the ground, because it is impossible to stand when your heart isn't beating. I felt him brush past me, felt his warmth brush past me, and I wanted to lean into his touch, his warmth, his unforgotten love.

As he walked through the door, I turned to watch, and I heard Tatsuha speak. And at once, I knew he was right.

"Well, you really fucked that one up, Eiri."

* * *

A/N YaY! The end of another chapter of long lost... sorry for keepin' all you folks waitin' but i've just been a bit uninspired lately... Anyway... I know Eiri's acting a BIT weird, but he's suddenly realised that he does love him. I want to know if you thought that the monologuing by shuichi was emotional enough. I think it's a very beautiful scene, but then, I'm the EVIL author! Anyway, see you next time for the last chapter of Long lost! 


	12. Airport

**A long lost father and lover.**

A/N: Hey everybody! Here it is! The end! THE last chapter of my fanfic! it's taken a year, and 2 different postings...(damn those nazi flamers..) But it's finished! For all of you who are sad it's over, I'm sorry... but, I'm happy that I'm finished...

Disclaimer: Gravitation is NOT mine... never was... And I'm making no profit from this.

Warnings: The usual crowd... m-preg, swearing(loads in Eiri's P.O.V.), slash, fluffiness... not really that bad...

A/N: Oh! I forgot! I've got a cliche in here. See if you can guess what it is from the chapter title!

Chapter 12: Airport.

EIRI'S P.O.V.

"Well, you fucked that one up, Eiri."

He was right. So completely fucking right. I was a complete fuck up, who'd fucked up his life not once, like most shitty people, but three fucking shit times.

And I figured that for once, he deserved to be told he was fucking right. Had always been bloody right. And that's why I did it. That's why I fell in a heap on the floor, crying my eyes out, in a bloody public place, and in front of fucking 50 odd random people.

Because he was right.

* * *

SHUICHI'S P.O.V.

I was so stupid.

How could I have thought that I was over him? That I felt no sadness or regret over leaving him? That anything I felt was just a flashback on how it felt to love him? But I was wrong. When he walked into that restaurant, all my feelings manifested, my heart as beating wildly, and suddenly I knew I was still madly in love with him. That's why I said what I did.

Because he didn't love me.

* * *

HIKARI'S P.O.V.

My life was a fucking mess.

I was just sitting there, absolutely miserable. My plan had not worked. In fact, it had backfired. Now papa was even less likely to return to Japan. I had thought he was still in love, but perhaps I had mistaken the look on his face as he talked of my other father.

I fell backwards so that I was lying on my bed. My papa's life seemed to be really fucked up. Perhaps it had been wrong of me to do that to him. And now, I was to leave Japan forever... I owed it to him to go quietly.

Because I saw the pain it was causing him.

* * *

SHU-CHAN'S P.O.V.

I felt so lonely already.

My Daddy was helping me pack my bags when I felt the first tears slide down my cheeks. I wished I didn't have to go away, but I knew there was no option. As I thought of my sisters, the two people I loved the most, but the people I'd be leaving behind, my tears increased. I would be away for a very long time, but they would bring me back every christmas. Still, to me it was centuries away.

Once he had finished packing my bags, my daddy took my hand and led me outside. I remembered what my sisters had told me, and wiped away my tears.

Because my tears made them sad.

* * *

SUGURU'S P.O.V.

Shu's heart was breaking as I drove him to the airport.

I knew how much he loved his sisters, and I knew how he hated to be away from them. Yet, I separated them. I wouldn't have if it could be avoided, but it couldn't. I was not capable of caring for all 4, and Shuichi would make a better job of bringing him up for the time being.

As we arrived at the airport I looked once more at his face. His eyes were determined and I could tell he was trying not to cry. I hugged him and told him it would be alright.

Because Shuichi would make it so.

* * *

RYUICHI'S P.O.V.

(A/N: Ryuichi doesn't have the brain capacity to have a pov, as such, so I've just written his train of thought.)

Oooooh! What a shiny airport! Don't you think so, kumagoro? Lookie lookie!

Huh? Where'd Tatsuha go? Ummm... help? Ah! There you are Tatsuha! Look! It's Fujisaki! And his little boy! What was his name again? Of course his name is Shu-chan...

Ah! Shuichi! Hi! Look at kumagoro! How am I? Oh, I'm happy. Are you happy? You don't look very happy... Oh... You're not... pity...

Oh well! I'm feeling very shiny today, and I'd like you to be shiny too! What do you say to that?

Oh, Hikari! You've grown a lot! I saw you 2 weeks ago? Oh... right, I did... oops!

Shuichi, you really don't look so happy... would you like me to sing a song?

* * *

SERIOUS RYUICHI'S P.O.V.

(A/N Serious Ryuichi, however, does.)

He stood there, glumly, before me, and I could see the pain in his face. I smiled and whispered to him. "Shuichi... I know you're sad, and I know you'll always have sadness in your life. But, remember. You've got to make the sparkle reach out to other people. You are sparkly, and that's what you can give to others." I winked at him. "You understand?"

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V.

Shuichi looked up into the other man's eyes. A smile broke his face. "I understand. I'll keep the sparkle going."

"Tatsuha..." Hikari whispered into said man's ear. "What the heck is 'The Sparkle'?"

"I have no idea..." Tatsuha shrugged.

Shuichi looked behind him. "Well, we'd better get going, or we'll miss our flight. Ready, Hikari? Shu-chan? Let's off and away. Tatsuha, Suguru, Hiro, Ryu, I guess I'll see you sometime in the future."

As they walked away, Hiro yelled. "You better come back one day, you idiot!"

* * *

HIKARI'S P.O.V.

I could feel the tears slide down my cheeks as I walked towards the big glass doors. I couldn't look back, couldn't bear to look at what I was leaving behind. I held my brother's hand tightly in my own, and walked forwards a little faster.

As I reached the doors, I stopped I had heard something very familiar behind me. It was a man's voice. And I was sure that papa had heard it too. Simultaneously, we turned to see the man with blonde hair and amber eyes, the eyes that were now glued upon papa. He was yelling.

"SHUICHIIIII!"

* * *

NORMAL P.O.V.

Eiri stopped in front of Shuichi, and placed his hands on his knees whilst panting heavily and noticeably. When he looked up, his eyes were determined.

"Don't leave Japan." The tone was commanding.

"Excuse me?" Shuichi blinked, annoyed.

"Don't leave." He kneeled, one knee on the dirty airport floor. "Please, don't leave Japan."

Shuichi turned away. "I really don't need to listen to this."

Eiri snatched his hand, holding it tight. "Please... listen to me."

A crowd had grown around the currently occurring spectacle, and there was an audible groan from the audience at Shuichi's next words.

"Tell me Eiri, why should I? When you never listened to me! Why should I listen? It's too late, Eiri. Go back to your fine house. Be sure I'll never set foot in it again. I never want to see you again."

"Why?" Eiri stood, moving yet closer to Shuichi. "Why do you not want to see me again?"

Shuichi just shook his head, his eyes were hidden by his long bangs, and it was impossible to tell what emotion they held.

"Why?" Eiri repeated, staringly lovingly at the man in front of him. "Why?"

"Can't you tell?" Shuichi looked into his eyes, and the older man could see the trails of tears running down his face. "I don't want to be hurt by you!"

Eiri wiped away the tears with his thumb, and cupped the man's face in his hands. "Why would I hurt you? I love you too much to do that!"

"Wh- what?" Shuichi stammered in shock.

"I love you! More than anything! More than anyone! I can't stand life without you! Marry me?"

Shuichi smiled. "One thousand times over!" He whispered, before crashing his lips into the other man's. His arms slithered around Eiri's neck and he closed his eyes in bliss.

As they parted to breathe, he whispered quickly before once again meeting lips with his love.

"Ai shiteru, Eiri Uesugi."

* * *

Do you see him? Behind that false facade.

He is the thief, come to steal your precious heart.

But if you were to remove that cold, hard, mask,

All that he desireth of you is the deepest of loves.

* * *

A/N: YaY! I am done! After that whole year... If you liked the story, soon I'll be putting omake in my lj, which is the site listed as my homepage... kireshai. there will be 3 or more epilogues to this story, and they'll be going up in the next few months... so, look out for them...

Right... the poem at the end was written by me, so I have all rights to the piece of shit. Yeah... that's about it...


	13. Epilogue 1: Bells

**A long lost father and lover.**

A/N: Hey everyone! I'm glad you all enjoyed my proper story! Y'know, that's the only story I've ever finished... woah! Big time surprise! I do a lot of drabbles, but they're silly, and either extremely sexual, extremely angsty, or extremely stupid. I recently wrote a sexual one, so...

Anyway, this is the first of my series of epilogues, and believe me, this is not necessary to my storyline, but the storyline is essential for reading these... I was thinking I might do a prologue with a bit of in detail on the breaking up scene. Last note: It's rather short.

I just have a review reply for 'zero coll'. Don't diss me until you can be worthy of it! You want me to stop writing? Show me the fanfictions you've done, and, if they're good, I'll think about not continuing. And, by the way, my IQ's 146. What's yours?

Anyway, disclaimer: NOT MINE!

Warnings: swearing, slash, beginnings of a sex scene.

Epilogue 1: Bells.

Shuichi tapped a spoon against his glass. When the people in the large room heard, they quietened, and turned their heads towards him attentively. "As you know." He spoke warmly, smiling at the crowd. "This is out semi-wedding-receptiony-dinnery... thing."

Most of the crowd laughed at his phrasing. "And now, we come, in fact, to the semi-wedding part of the evening." He looked down at the man sitting next to him, then looked up again. "As you are aware, under national law, and due to the... nature, of our relationship, we are not legally permitted to wed."

The crowd 'awwed' in disappointment, but Shuichi continued to smile, and they quietened in favour of hearing the end of the speech.

"And so, we call on our resident monk, Tatsuha, who seems a little too eager, if you ask me, to do the job." There was wide spread applause at this announcement, and Tatsuha stood, walking to the center of the large room. Shuichi pulled Eiri up from sitting next to him, and they stumbled to stand in front of Tatsuha.

Tatsuha spoke. "Okay, hold hands." They did so, and he spoke to the entirety of the large room. "Does anyone know any impediments or other such shit?" The entire room shook their heads in unison, and Tatsuha grinned. "Well then, Eiri, do you?"

"Yeah, I guess so..."

"Shuichi, do you?"

"Actually, after hearing his answer, I think I've changed my mind." Shuichi pouted, and started to step away.

"Fine! I do! Do you like that?" Eiri shouted.

"I do!" Shuichi said, while grinning.

Tatsuha called. "Well, I guess you're marr-" He was cut off by what they were doing. "Hey! Could you wait to kiss until after I tell you to?"

* * *

"Shuichi..." Eiri whispered into the ear of the man next to him. "I want to go to sleep." 

"Shh." Shuichi hissed whilst reading. "I'm trying to read. Just go to sleep already."

"I can't sleep with the light on. Besides, people are supposed to have a terrific fuck on their wedding night. Are you gonna deny me that?" He licked the shell of the younger man's ear.

Shuichi shivered, but held firm. "We had an abnormal wedding. We can have an abnormal wedding night. I do NOT feel like being buggered."

Eiri decided it wasn't worth arguing over. Grabbing the book from Shuichi's hand, he tossed it to the floor. In the same movement, he straddled the smaller man, taking him by surprise.

Leaning down, he began to kiss him passionately. He spoke in between kisses. "I-am-going-to-fuck-you-tonight-because-I-said-so-brat."

Shuichi threw his weight to the side, so that he was now on top. "Na-ah. Tonight I am not gonna bottom. I'm gonna give you a buggering you'll never forget, Eiri Uesugi."

A/N There it is! First epilogue up and running. They're all just for humour. And if you want to see my omake, check out this site: Kireshai. livejournal. com. unfortunately, there won't be a link, because ffn. net is screwy, but you can put it in ur url(without the spaces), and go there for my omake. and the omake are guaranteed to be slightly amusing, by my friend winnister.


	14. Interruption

Hiya people, just to note, this chapter doesn't have an epilogue, unfortunately, but I felt the need to give a bit of a reply to one of my reviewers, the evil-flamer 'zero cool', who can't even spell their own name half the time! So, all of my readers who have suffered the bad end of someone's typing, this is for you guys! Never give up because the idiots told you to! Warning: I swear.

Dear Zero cool,

I'm sorry, how could I have thought your IQ was lower than mine? I mean, your flames just ooze with such intellegence! I'm SO sorry I offended you! How can you ever forgive me! I'm gonna stop writing fanfiction right away, and listen to YOUR advice. I mean, who wouldn't listen to a complete stranger who has worse grammar than you, no experience to prove they're better than you, who doesn't review with their account so you can't settle the matter in private, and doesn't even know your real height?

AS IF!

Forget it, you pathetic person. I'm not giving up, just because you came along and said my fanfiction was silly. Get a reality check, dude. My fanfictions ARE silly, because they're SUPPOSED to be! It's a comedy, for fuck's sake! Did you really think I would make it serious?

Oh, I forgot to mention last time, ONLY stupid people, and talentless people flame. People with talent, and sense, give constructive criticism. And believe me, I know, because I've met people like you, who think they're telling the truth, but really, they're only telling part of it. And I thank the powers above everyday, because I'm not a sad person like you! I have respect for other people, and I have a talent, and I can respect others' talents.

Fanfiction is not, in fact, my forte. I am an unpaid beta. Which actually brings me to my last point. Being the type of person that betas, I have REALLY good grammar. And I can place your IQ from the amount of grammatical errors in your review. You made approximately 23 grammar errors. Because, in that review, I'd make about 2 errors at most, and you made 23, when my IQ is 146, yours is around 80.

Nice to meet you, IQ of 80.

Oh, by the way, I'm 6ft. Don't call me little.

To all of you into reading this thing, the next epilogue will be up, hopefully, tonight, in maybe an hour or so... So, hope to hear reviews for the next epilogue. And remember! Whenever they flame you, just hit them with a bit of carbon dioxide, and keep writing! That's what'll always put a fire out! Don't forget to check out the long lost omake at kireshai. Livejournal. com, and I'll love you forever.


	15. Epilogue 2: Sick

**A long lost father and lover.**

A/N Sorry everybody! I know this has been long in coming! This is the second episode for my ffn, long lost! Hope you enjoy it! Also, a reminder to visit my lj, kireshaidotlivejournaldotcom, and have a look at my long lost omake, which is a short, 4 panel manga making fun of an event in my story. And leave comments too! I love comments! If you want you can have a look through some of the other stuff on my lj, and I would appreciate it greatly if you reviewed them as well! Last thing, this is 3 months later.

Disclaimer: I own... nothing.

Warnings: M-preg, swearing, yeah, not much...

Epilogue 2: Sick.

Eiri felt terrible. Like complete and utter certified shit. His insides were shot, his outsides were worse, his face was green, and his mouth tasted like cow pat.

He once again began to retch, and just before the lumpy custard-like substance called vomit came out of hi mouth, he directed himself to the toilet bowl.

Shuichi walked quietly into the bathroom, to stand a metre behind him. He knew that Eiri got rather tetchy when he was unwell. "You okay, Eiri?"

"Oh, absolutely fan-fucking-tastic! I feel top of the world! I mean, throwing up every morning doesn't make me feel unwell at all!"

"Sorry." Shuichi grinned. "Have you been to the doctor."

There was a short silence, before. "...No."

"Then I'll take you!"

Line..

An hour later, Shuichi was standing in Tokyo general hospital while Eiri had his check up. His head shot up from the position it had been in when he heard Eiri's yell.

"WHAT THE FUCK?"

A few minutes later, a very disgruntled and not at all elegant or composed Eiri walked out of the room, looking ready to kill.

"What's the problem?" Shuichi queried whilst standing.

"It's your fault!" Eiri accused, while looking at the ground forcefully.

"What's my fault?" Shuichi placed his hands on his hips indignantly.

"I'm... pregnant."

"HOLY SHIT!"

A/N Mwa ha ha! Bet you didn't see that one coming! I'm so cool! I love myself! Other than that, I hoped you liked reading it as much as I liked writing it. And as I've noted before, it was extremely short, but well worth it!

Err... last message for my stalker.

Dear Mr. Stalker Sir,

I'm afwaid my mommy don't wike me gibing out my details to wandom stwangers on de intrenet. It's an inbasion of my pwivacy... So you'll understand if I don't acquiesce to your request.

See you next chapter,

Kireshai.


	16. Epilogue 3: Eulogy

**A long lost father and lover.**

A/N: Hey everybody! This the third epilogue, it is also rather short... but very sad. If you're not an angst lover you might not like it... Anyway, I hope you all enjoy it! Read it, and, if you want, you can read my note to my stalker at the end. Anyway, enjoy. I know it doesn't go along with the story, but in this, yuki slept with kitazawa.

Disclaimer: Never mine. cries

Warnings: M-preg, slash, character death.

Epilogue 3: Eulogy.

SHUICHI'S P.O.V.

I cry for him everyday. I cry for him every second. That's what I do nowadays. I live and I cry. Because he can't do either. My husband and love died at the young age of 40, in the year 2017. He was born in the year 1977, and lived an interesting life.

He killed 3 men at the age of 16. He wrote 74 bestselling novels. He separated from his family at the age of 18, and took on the name of a man he had killed. He had slept with over 300 women, and loved none of them. He had slept with 2 men, and loved both of them. All in all, that's all a life comes to. Numbers on a page.

Anyway, that's what I tell my son. What I tell him everyday, so that he'll know the truth about the man who bore him. The truth about the father he'll never meet.

I love my son. To me, he is perfect in every way. I don't care that he needs more attention than most children, or that he can't read or write at the age of 10. Because, he is special to me. Especially because he is blind.

It isn't a recessive defect. It's because Eiri smoked while pregnant. Smoking. It was the cause of his death as well. He died of respiratory failure. I always knew he shouldn't have smoked so much, but he was hooked, and I didn't make him stop. I'll always hate myself for not making him stop.

Everyday I miss him, and everyday I love him more, because what he gave me is so much more than what he took away. 2 lives for 1. Sometimes I think life's unfair, making the exchange. But it isn't, because it gave me him.

A/N: Ta-da! Yet another shiny chapter of my ffn. I hope you all enjoyed it. There'll be one more epilogue, so, Adieu. Ja matane! And just one last message to my stalker:

English isn't your first language? You definitely aren't a judge of my writing if that's the case. Come back and read it when you understand all the words. If you don't understand every single word in this fic, don't flame anyone else. Because, how can you understand the ideas behind the story if you can't read the words?

Oh, yeah, I'm not American, and I'm not English, yet I have spoken fluent english all my life. If you read my profile, which, of course, you haven't, you'd know I live in Australia. So, come up with an impenetrable argument before beginning the debate.


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